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Watch: War Hero Sen. Tammy Duckworth Calls Trump ‘Draft Dodger’ and ‘Cadet Bone Spurs’
In 2004, while on deployment in Iraq, the UH-60 Black Hawk helicopter that Sen. Tammy Duckworth (D-Ill.) was co-piloting was hit by a rocket grenade launcher. Duckworth would lose her right leg near the hip and her left leg below the knee from injuries she suffered in the attack. So you can imagine how much…
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Trump’s Big Mad After Chief of Staff Contradicts His Stance on Border Wall and Calls Him ‘Uninformed’: Report
According to President Donald Trump, his position on the border wall to separate Mexico and the United States has never changed, despite what White House chief of staff John Kelly said in recent interviews, and despite Trump’s flip-flopping on the wall since running for president. On Wednesday, Kelly appeared on Fox News and said that…
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Matt Barnes Is Boycotting McNuggets After Learning That Shaq’s Son Didn’t Make the McDonald’s All-Star Team
Shareef O’Neal, son of NBA Hall of Famer Shaquille O’Neal, is one of the best high school players in the country and is headed to Arizona to play basketball. Yet he must not have impressed Mayor McCheese-and-nem enough to land in the prestigious McDonald’s All-American Game. And that has former NBA player Matt Barnes mad…
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Trump Wants a ‘Bill of Love’ to Protect DACA Recipients, but Only if He Gets His Dumbass Border Wall
Someone must have taken the old president’s brain out and replaced it with a pot roast because in a magical switch that can only be explained by science and a full-on lobotomy, the president has promised 25 lawmakers that if they can bring him a bill that will extend protections to 800,000 immigrants’ children, he…
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Former President Barack Obama Will Be 1st Guest on David Letterman’s New Netflix Show
David Letterman has a six-episode series coming to Netflix, and his first guest will be our president for life—the man, the myth, the legend: former President Barack Obama. According to the Daily Beast, this will be the first talk show appearance for the last decent president America will ever have since he turned over the…
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Witness: Robert Mueller’s Federal Grand Jury Looks Like Black Lives Matter Rally
So it turns out that special counsel Robert Mueller might be a secret Hotep who is an ally of the nation of Wakanda, as the supporters of President Donald Trump are tight after learning that Mueller’s grand jury has too many black people on it. Apparently, a Trump associate who testified told a New York…
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Steve Bannon Is Spilling the Lipton, Claims 2016 Trump Tower Meeting With Russian Lawyer Was ‘Treasonous’
Steve Bannon, the former White House chief strategist with the skin of a rotten potato, is turning on President Donald Trump and his minions. For all of us who love a good fuss fight, The Guardian obtained an early copy of the new book Fire and Fury, by Michael Wolff, which includes hundreds of interviews,…
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Former NFL Players Michael Irvin and Eric Davis Accused of Sexually Harassing NFL Network Employee: Report
Eric Davis and Michael Irvin are the latest former NFL players-turned-NFL Network analysts to be accused of sexual misconduct. Marshall Faulk, Warren Sapp and Donovan McNabb and others were named in an initial lawsuit by former NFL Network employee Jami Cantor, who claims that the men sexually harassed her. Now another NFL Network employee, Erin…
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Someone Stole Former NBA Player Charlie Villanueva’s Toilet and He’s Pissed
Someone has made off with former NBA player Charlie Villanueva’s toilet, and Villanueva swears that this isn’t a joke. The former power forward, who last played for the Dallas Mavericks, took to Twitter to chart the whole shitty experience. Oh, Charlie, the shit gets crazier. I literally can’t make this shit up. I also never…
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Former White House Press Secretary Sean ‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer Is Writing a Tell-All. Let’s Come Up With Book Names
I imagine that Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer still feels indentured to his master Donald J. Trump, so the news that he’s writing a tell-all about his months in the White House isn’t that appealing, considering that he still loves his overlord. Chances are the book is going to be an exposé of how misunderstood the…