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Biden Is Already Draining the Swamp, Fires 3 of Trump’s Worst Appointees
One of former President Shitbag Von Nunu’s best traits was that he was notoriously bad at the mundane shit. Instead of hiring people who were qualified in their respective fields, Von Nunu placed an emphasis on loyalty over everything. In turn, he put people who didn’t know what the fuck they were doing into powerful…
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VP Kamala Harris Swears in 3 Democratic Senators, Flipping Control of Senate and Effectively Running Things
Vice President Kamala Harris’ third order of business—her first was stuntin’ on these hoes, and the second was making sure that a broke bitch had nothing to say—was making sure that she installed the last Infinity Stone to secure Democratic power. Shortly after being sworn-in herself, Harris swore in three new Democratic senators Wednesday afternoon,…
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The Return to Boredom America Deserves
The past four years of Trump’s presidency have been like living with a drug addict who is deep in their addiction. Anyone who has endured this unfortunate cohabitation knows that each day brings with it a certain unsteadiness that creates its own kind of frantic normalcy. It’s toxic and exhausting and if you stay in…
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GTFOH Trump Watch: And Just Like That, the Devil Is Gone
If you have a moment to take, take it. We survived. We survived the racism, the xenophobia, the disrespect, the insensitivity, the negative rhetoric, the divisiveness, the homophobia. We survived beyond the wall, the migrant children in cages, the good people on both sides, the chaos, the blatant cheating on America with Russia, the mayonnaise-slathered…
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Biden’s Plan in the First 100 Days: Stimulus Checks, COVID-19 Relief and Fixing Damage Done by Trump
We’ve had to wait four years to get an adult in the White House, and now, on the heels of the inauguration of President-elect Joe Biden, let’s take a look at the incoming president’s first 100 days in office. We can argue about the amount promised versus the amount expected to be sent out (I…
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GTFOH Trump Watch: The End Is Near
Apparently, in between stealing whatever isn’t nailed down in the White House and helping Melania pack for a long stay with her boyfriend, Trump is planning on issuing 100 pardons, and as long as he pardons himself out of America’s house, I don’t give a fuck. Oh, and he’s still looking at being impeached because…
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‘QAnon Shaman’ Lawyer Wants Trump to Pardon His Grass-Fed Client
Now that the lawyer has gotten the “QAnon shaman’s” organic diet taken care of, he’s looking for the president who caused the insurrection on the Capitol last week to pardon his client. In an interview with CNN, Albert Watkins said his client, Jacob Chansley, “felt like he was answering the call of our president” when…
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Kingmaker Stacey Abrams Has Unfinished Business, Will Run for Georgia Governor, Allies Say
We argue about everything at The Root. It’s one of the perks of working here. We engage in intelligent conversation about everything. So shortly after Joe Biden won the presidential election, I asked my colleagues which cabinet position they thought Abrams would be given. I was promptly told to STFU. “Nigga, are you crazy?!” one…
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How Joe Biden’s $2,000 Stimulus Promise Turned Into $1,400 Overnight
Damnit, Joe. Not like this. Joe Biden hasn’t even taken office and he’s already pulling some fuckshit. On Thursday, Biden unveiled his proposal for a relief package that would cost some $1.9 trillion to help the struggling economy during the coronavirus pandemic. But it appears that Biden forgot about the $2,000 he promised Americans and…
