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New England Patriots Owner Robert Kraft Charged With Soliciting Prostitution and Police Have Video: Report
The owner of the Super Bowl champion New England Patriots, Robert Kraft, has been charged with soliciting prostitution in a Florida spa, and reportedly was caught on camera getting…ummm…sexual services. According to CNBC, the very old and very rich Kraft was one of some two dozen people who were caught up in a human trafficking…
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Sarah Huckabee Sanders Lies Again, Claims Trump Has Never ‘Done Anything But Condemn Violence’
White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders is confusing. I don’t know if “Suckabee” is a shameless liar who’d do anything to keep her job and in the good graces of her orange master or if she honestly believes the bullshit that is coming out of her mouth. On Friday, amid news reports that a…
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Watch: Tucker Carlson Blows His Bowtie, Calls Guest a 'Moron' In Expletive-Laced Unaired Segment
Fake Fox News host Tucker Carlson continues to run his game as the overly snotty, uber-conservative who knows more about everything than his liberal guests, yet he historically gets his ass handed to him on a regular basis. Like the time he got owned by Occidental College professor Caroline Heldman: Or the time he got…
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Clarence Thomas Proves That He’s Still Alive and Willing to Do Trump’s Dirty Work
Every now and then, Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas does something to remind us, the viewing public, that he’s still alive. In 2006, the stoic and curmudgeonly old black man coughed. In 2007, he raised an eyebrow. In 2010, he moved his hand to wipe something from his mouth. It is believed that the thing…
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Covington Catholic MAGA Hat Teen Who Helped Terrorize Native American Activist Is Suing the Washington Post
Nothing says white privilege like being a self-satisfied asshole wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat and impeding the path of a Native American activist; and then, when called out on said assholishness, suing the billionaire owner of the Washington Post (when every damn paper in America wrote about that story) for $250 million. But,…
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Trump Wanted Ally to Un-Recuse Himself So He Could Oversee Michael Cohen Investigation: Report
The relationship between President Trump and former acting Attorney General Matthew Whitaker soured late last year after the president sought to put an ally in charge of the investigation into hush money payments made by the president’s former lawyer to women claiming to have had affairs with Trump. The New York Times reports that Trump…
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Roger Stone Can’t Stop Trolling and It Might Land Him in Jail
Roger Stone, the president’s longtime associate who dresses like Drake’s father, may end up in jail earlier than he thought after the judge presiding over his case called him back into court Thursday to discuss images targeting her that Stone posted on his Instagram profile. U.S. District Judge Amy Berman Jackson wants Stone to explain…
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Bernie Sanders, the Method Man of Democrats, Is Running for President
Unfortunately, like wide-legged denim, choker necklaces and whooping cough, Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders is back. On Tuesday, America’s favorite Uber driver announced that he’s running for president in 2020 after suffering defeat to the insufferable Hillary Clinton in 2016. “I am asking you to join me today as part of an unprecedented and historic grassroots…
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Colin Kaepernick and Eric Reid Reach Settlement in NFL Collusion Case: Report
Former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick and current Carolina Panthers safety Eric Reid have reached a confidential settlement effectively ending their collusion lawsuit with the NFL that argued owners worked to keep both men off the field for protesting the killings of unarmed black men, women and children by police. Both Kaepernick and Reid found themselves…
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Trump Declares National Emergency and Then Goes Off the Rails In Unhinged Ramblefest
On Friday, as expected, President HooHoo Von WiffleStick walked out into the White House Rose Garden and used his executive powers to declare a national emergency to stop the influx of Mexican Decepticons at the Southern border and to aid Optimus Prime in the battle to keep America safe. “I’m going to be signing a…

