Auntie Unfiltered: My Mother-In-Law Won't Eat My Cooking

I am not now nor have I ever been married. It just never happened.

Don’t worry; your auntie has not been over here suffering in lonely spinsterdom, and to be clear, I love being boo’d up; I just don’t want be tied down.


I do have friends and cousins who are either still married now or have been in the past. A thing many of them have shared with me is their relationships with their mother-in-laws.

These relationships vary across the spectrum. While some friends contend that they have amazing relationships with the women they refer to as their “mother in love,” others have described a person who appears to be Maleficent in the flesh.


The complaints also vary. Some mother-in-laws are way too nosey and meddling while others are standoffish and rude.

One of our readers wrote in to discuss her mother-in-law, who she says refuses to eat anything she cooks. What a tough spot to be in! Don’t worry; even though I have never been married, I always have good advice on effective communication. Watch the video to see what our reader said and to hear what I had to say back to her.

And remember, I want to hear from you! Please email me at with your questions, comments, concerns, and requests for advice. Next week, we will be discussing self care in the age of coronavirus. Let me know how you are taking care of yourself in these trying times or if you need advice on how to make your days better.

News Editor for The Root. I said what I said. Period.

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I want to know how this works though.


  • Does MIL get invited over for dinner and then sit and refuse to eat anything?
  • Or does she simply decline snacks, homemade cookies/cakes etc when they’re offered on a casual visit.
  • Will she eat chips/nuts/snacks etc that weren’t cooked by DIL? In other words, does she not eat in their house at all? Or does she not eat food solely made by DIL while there?
  • If son (rather than DIL) makes food will momma eat it?
  • Was MIL resistant to DIL and son’s nuptials
  • Does MIL even talk to DIL?
  • If so, how? Friendly/convivial or salty/posty?

Number of possibilities:

  • MIL is dieting
  • MIL has eating disorder
  • MIL “doesn’t want to impose”
  • MIL doesn’t eat what they eat
  • MIL thinks nothing but her own cooking is good enough for her boy
  • MIL thinks DIL can’t cook for shit
  • MIL hates DIL and doesn’t know why son married that no-good trash

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