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5 Signs of Dating Desperation

Clutch magazine's Janelle Harris says that compulsive man seekers sacrifice a lot for the sake of having a warm body in their beds or a new beau by their sides. Here's how she suggests you determine whether a fear of being single is getting in your way.

You're always making excuses for him.

I've known women obviously getting beat down by their men on a regular basis and others who've been mollywhopped by rants and raves about their worthlessness. But they still find a reason to defend their man's honor — not only because they're conditioned to put him on a pedestal, but because they're so scared of him, they'd rather pardon the behavior than confront the obvious fact that he's not worth the emotional and mental investment. Just to have a man.

You haven't been single longer than a week in your whole adult life.

Some experts say it takes two years to bounce back fully from a previous relationship, maybe longer depending on the circumstances of the situation and the emotional condition of the folks doing the bouncing back …

You reason, "Well, it's better than being alone."

He's cheated, he's lazy but breathing, and lays a pretty good piece of pipe, so you opt to make it work with him instead of running the risk of staying drenched in singleness like the rest of us in that 42 percent. But sweetie pie, I'll take single over settling any time. I think we all should. Even J. Lo and Halle.


Read Janelle Harris' entire piece at Clutch magazine.

The Root aims to foster and advance conversations about issues relevant to the black Diaspora by presenting a variety of opinions from all perspectives, whether or not those opinions are shared by our editorial staff.

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