Where's the Support for Tameka Raymond?

Ben Rose/Getty Images
Ben Rose/Getty Images

The Root's contributing editor Demetria L. Lucas writes in her Essence column that Usher's ex-wife is a grieving mother who deserves our sympathy, not our judgment, in the wake of the tragic accident that left her son, Kyle Glover, brain-dead.

Sure, there have been tweets and story comments wishing the best for Tameka during this time. But they don't seem to compare to the outpouring of sympathy that, say, Rihanna received when her grandmother Dolly passed on June 30. Twitter was flooded with condolences calling Rihanna a "poor thing" and noting how "it must be so hard for her." For Tameka, too many people seem to have gone mute — or worse, they've deemed her family tragedy some sort of "karma" for however they think she did Usher and/or her ex-husband. 

I don't get it. I know she's not Black America's favorite person; she's about as likable as Robin Givens circa her divorce from Mike Tyson. Tameka's marriage to Usher never really went over that well with his fans. Despite him being a grown-behind man capable of making his own choices, she was made out to be an evil cougar-woman taking advantage of him. Let Tameka tell it, the hate was because she's a brown skinned lady. But the more popular reasons were rumors that she seduced Usher and broke up her own marriage to be with him. Oh, and she disrupted the relationship between Usher and his mother, perhaps the worst offense. When their marriage dissolved — with so many rushing to say "I told you so!" — the nasty, public divorce and custody battle only made her more loathed. But none of this should have anything to do with whether Tameka should be offered sympathy under the current circumstances.

Tameka may be a lady folks don't particularly like, for whatever reasons, but she's also a grieving mother. Scapegoating her again as her child is battling to live, then having the audacity to send that blame to her Twitter account, is just plain dead-wrong-evil.


Read Demetria L. Lucas' entire piece at Essence.com.

The Root aims to foster and advance conversations about issues relevant to the black Diaspora by presenting a variety of opinions from all perspectives, whether or not those opinions are shared by our editorial staff.