Ah, the long, glorious of days of summer: when the drink menus are filled with rosé, the racists are furious and sunburned, and our favorite freshman congresswomen have officially run out of patience for white nonsense. On this past Tuesday afternoon, the Congresswomen in question included Ayanna Pressley (D-Mass.) and Ilhan Omar (D-Minn.), who—despite all prior evidence showing they are not the ones to be tried—yet again found themselves in the position of having to clapback at the most boorish and belligerent of what America has to offer.
Let’s start with Rep. Pressley, who has been trying to direct public attention to the humanitarian crisis at the border, despite a large swath of Beltway media Birdman-rubbing their hands over what they consider a far worthier story: who is Nancy Pelosi subbing today?
On Tuesday, Kellyanne Conway, ever the opportunist, leaped at the slightest whiff of drama, sharing a Politico story about her...leaping at the slightest whiff of drama, this time between Pelosi and several freshman congresswomen over their opposition to a Senate proposal to add $4.6 billion in funding to detention camps at the U.S.-Mexico border
“Major Meow Mashup” wrote Conway, which really just sounds like a really terrible (and really sexist) brand of wet cat food, but go off, sis.
Well, Rep. Pressley must have placed a hold on her calendar yesterday afternoon, because she had time.
“Oh hi Distraction Becky,” Pressley responded. “Remember that time your boss tore babies from their mothers’ arms and threw them in cages? Yeah take a seat and keep my name out of your lying mouth.”
I’d ask someone to go check on Kellyanne, but upon further reflection, I really don’t care, do you? Moving on!
Next, we have perennial contender for most racist asshat on television, Tucker Carlson, who—surprise—said another wildly xenophobic thing on national television recently.
This time, Carlson targeted Rep. Omar calling the Somali-born lawmaker “living proof that the way we practice immigration has become dangerous to this country.”
“Virtually every public statement she makes accuses Americans of bigotry and racism. This is an immoral country, she says. She has undisguised contempt for the United States and for its people,” Carlson said on his show Tuesday night. “That should worry you, and not just because Omar is now a sitting member of Congress.”
“A system designed to strengthen America is instead undermining it,” he added. “She’s a living fire alarm, a warning to the rest of us that we ought to change our immigration system immediately, or else.”
For all of Carlson’s consternation about Omar (and his own failure, as a native-born citizen, to assimilate to the ideals of equality, liberty, and justice for all), Omar herself appeared fundamentally unbothered, hitting Tucker with the crying-laughing emojis on Twitter—universally recognized shorthand for “lol you really, truly and irrevocably ain’t shit.”
“Not gonna lie, it’s kinda fun watching a racist fool like this weeping about my presence in Congress,” Omar wrote in response to Carlson’s racist attack.
“No lies will stamp out my love for this country or my resolve to make our union more perfect,” she added. “They will just have to get used to calling me Congresswoman!”
Omar took a more sober tone when she revisited his comments on Twitter Wednesday afternoon, noting that Carlson’s nightly show functions as a sort of white supremacist rhetoric happy hour.
“Advertisers should not be underwriting hate speech,” she said.