white house
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Nurses Honor Fallen Colleagues Outside of White House, Protest for PPE: ‘We Are Not Getting What We Need’
On Thursday, members of National Nurses United, the largest nurses’ union in the country, staged a protest just yards away from the White House, petitioning the government to support healthcare workers who are continuing to treat coronavirus patients without proper protective gear. Clad in red shirts and wearing face masks, they stood among 80 pairs…
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Trump Is a Fuckboi and Fauci Is the Homie Who’s About to Expose His Lying Ass
Back in my fuckboi days, when I had like four girlfriends, I used to do a move I called, “divide and keep dividing.” It looked like this: I would tell one girlfriend a lie and then I had to keep her away from anyone else who could tell her the truth because that would fuck…
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For the First Time in a Year, the White House Press Secretary Is Going to Speak, and It’s Going to Be a Disaster
Before the Trumps took over the White House and parked a broken-down Chevy pickup, trampoline and inflatable swimming pool on the front lawn, there used to be regularly scheduled press briefings. But the president is a liar, and as the White House press secretary, I’d imagine it’s hard to explain the president’s lies when staring…
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Watch: Trump Blows His Toupee Because He Doesn’t Like Answering Questions During Press Briefings That He Continues to Host
Donald Trump is such a camera hog that he does his own press briefings. It’s a moment for the narcissist-in-chief to preen like a peacock. What he can’t stand is anyone who questions the image he wants projected to the people. You know who else is like this? Every dictator who has ever dictated. Unfortunately…
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Trump Administration Looking to Reopen America Next Month Because They’re All Idiots
Dr. Ben Carson is a world-renowned surgeon who may go down in history as one of the best to ever wield a scalpel. He’s currently a member of the Trump administration, and his position? He’s the doctor of housing. He may have been the only hope in terms of flattening the curve of idiocy inside…
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Good News for Tardy Tax Payers: The White House Will Extend Filing Deadlines an Extra Three Months
In these trying times, we could all use an extra grace period to get all of our affairs in order. Of course, there are those of us who wait until the last minute to get things done regardless of the times. In either case, there’s a bit of good news on the horizon for people…
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To Combat the Coronavirus, Trump Administration Proposes an Emergency Stimulus Check for Every Adult American: 'We Have to Do This Now'
Feeding into mass hysteria isn’t exactly my ministry, but I think it’s safe to say that at this point, the coronavirus has ruined almost all of our lives to some extent. But as I sit here in my dark apartment, devoid of groceries, NBA highlights and social interaction, I take solace in knowing that our…
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Good News For People Who Like Terrible People: President Trump Tested Negative For COVID-19
Welp, if you were waiting on news to break that President Donald Trump has come down with “that Rona,” you’ll be disappointed. According to AP News, the White House released test results Saturday night revealing that the president received negative results for COVID-19 after being tested for coronavirus on Friday. Yesterday, The Root reported that…