Screenshot: Spectrum News

Two grown-ass men decided that it would fun to steal a statue of Fredrick Douglass, who was reportedly minding his own business and just hanging out because that’s what statues do.

Fortunately, the Rochester, N.Y., police weren’t fucking around and apprehended the men who were reportedly sitting at a bus stop with old Fredrick Douglass just standing around looking like a Vice President Mike Pence. Fine, I don’t know where police found the men or even if they had Fredrick Douglass with them at the time but the idea of two guys catching a city bus with a statue is hilarious to me.

According to WHEC News 10, police arrested John Boedicker, 20, of Endicott, N.Y., and Charles Milks, 21, of Kenmore, N.Y. Both men have been charged with criminal mischief in the fourth degree which is more commonly referred to as the “drunken asshole charge.”

Below are images from Twitter that show the damage and destruction that was left behind.

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The statue had only been up for a month before these dickwads allegedly decided to tear it down. Police have the statue in custody but added that it was damaged in the theft.

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It turns out that both Boedicker (I didn’t make this up, this is really this guy’s last name) and Milks are students at St. John Fisher College, which issued a statement basically saying that they aren’t cool with the statue allegedly being taken down by two of its students.

Witnesses told the news station that as many as five or six men worked to free the statue before taking off down the street.

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Douglass lived in Rochester and is buried in a local cemetery. The statue was erected to commemorate the bicentennial of the birth of the famous abolitionist, the news station reports.

“The fact that the monument has been ripped down is truly bothersome,” said Carvin Eison, Project Director of “Re-Energizing the Legacy of Frederick Douglass,” told the news station.

“This is exactly the kind of ignorance and racism that Douglass was our shining example of advocating against and fighting against,” added Bleu Cease, the Co-Director.

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Cease told the news station that they hope to get another statue up soon, but has anyone checked on Umar Johnson the 14th grand nephew of Douglass’ first wife?