Scandal Is Back to Help Us Forget About the Crazy Shit Going on in the Real White House

Kerry Washington as Olivia Pope in Scandal (Richard Cartwright/ABC)
Kerry Washington as Olivia Pope in Scandal (Richard Cartwright/ABC)

The current presidential administration has many of us wondering, “Where the hell is B613 when you need it??” Clearly, B613 hasn’t been busy ensuring the continued integrity and stability of the republic in real life, but the good news is that after a seven-month hiatus, B613 will be back on our TV screens this Thursday with Scandal’s season 6 premiere.


It’s impossible to remember every lie, murder and election-rigging scandal from last season, but here’s a quick look back at where things left off to get us ready for the season 6 premiere.

After five seasons of side-piecing, Olivia Pope and President Fitzgerald Grant III finally tried to make a legitimate go of it. Fitz kicked first lady Mellie Grant out of the White House and moved Olivia in to play the role of first lady, which consisted mainly of picking out flatware and sharing snickerdoodle recipes.

Of course, Olivia has always been more interested in having power than in hosting parties, so after a lame proposal and a very brief engagement, Olivia and Fitz crashed and burned in epic fashion and Olivia moved out of the White House. Ultimately, Olivia realized that she’d actually rather be a side piece than a wife.

On the other hand, Fitz and Mellie’s divorce was the best thing that ever happened to Mellie. With Fitz out of the picture, Mellie stepped all the way into her purpose. She became a senator, held the longest-running filibuster in modern times to support Planned Parenthood and launched her presidential campaign with—gasp—Olivia as her campaign manager. Even though Olivia had moved out of the White House, she’d tasted the power of the Oval Office, and she wanted back in ... just not as a first lady.

Mellie, with Olivia’s help, bested her Republican rivals—Vice President Susan Ross, whose love affair with Attorney General David Rosen ultimately cost her the election; and Hollis Doyle, who played a Donald Trump-like racist, xenophobic, misogynist—and won her party’s nomination. Of course, in real life, we elected our own racist, xenophobic misogynist. (And by “we,” I don’t mean we.)

Fitz didn’t just lose Olivia and Mellie last season. He also lost his chief of staff, Cyrus Beene. After years of being Fitz’s right-hand man and anger translator, Cyrus moved on and found himself a new political puppet in the form of Democratic Gov. Francisco Vargas, whom Cyrus propelled onto the national political stage by becoming his campaign manager. Cyrus helped Vargas beat his Democratic rival and Olivia’s old flame, Sen. Edison Davis, despite Davis having the support of Olivia’s father, Rowan/Eli/Papa Pope and his B613 minion/Olivia’s on-again, off-again lover Jake Ballard.


But Papa Pope wanted Jake in the White House, and as we all know, what Papa Pope wants, Papa Pope gets. Once the dust settled from a season-long game of political chairs, the finale ended with Mellie announcing Jake as her vice president and Francisco Vargas announcing ... wait for it ... Cyrus as his vice president. And to no one’s surprise, it looks as if Papa Pope may have masterminded the whole thing.

While Mellie and Frankie may be the faces of their tickets, we all know they’re just pawns in a battle for the White House among Olivia, Papa Pope and Cyrus. With their political puppets launched firmly on their fingertips, it will be an all-out war for 1600 Pennsylvania. My money’s always on Papa Pope.


As we head into season 6, I want to know:

  • Are Fitz and Liv finally done? Like done done? And did Jake finally quit Liv once and for all? (I’m going to guess a hard “no” on that one.)
  • Will Mama Pope be back? Will there ever be a scene more cringeworthy than when Mama Pope chewed her wrists apart in her jail cell?
  • Are Cyrus and his former escort/husband Michael still together? And will Cyrus’ daughter, Ella, ever get a line on the show?
  • Are Abby Whelan and Leo Bergen still together? I hope so. Quietly, Leo is my favorite character on the show.
  • What are the rest of the gladiators, Quinn, Huck and Marcus, up to?
  • What will be the Defiance/Albatross/Remington/Foxtail/Lazarus One scandal of the season?
  • Will Scandal continue to imitate life with episodes like the Ferguson, Mo.-inspired episode, “The Lawn Chair”?
  • Moreover, with Donald Trump in office, how will Scandal’s plot lines ever be more scandalous than reality?

We’ll find out soon enough. What are your predictions for season 6?



Seriously, where the hell is B613 when you need them? THIS WOULD BE A GREAT TIME, PAPA POPE!