Politics
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Trump Offers ‘Isis Fighters’ to French President Because He Just Can’t Stop Being a Global Embarrassment
American albatross and the president of people who believe in UFOs sat across from the president of France—a real president—who continuously embarrassed Trump in a tense meeting that the U.S. president made tense by being an asshole. During the sideline NATO meeting Tuesday, Trump did the condescending asshole-y thing he does where he offered the…
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Kamala Harris Drops Out of Presidential Race Amid Rumors of a Directionless Campaign That Was Hemorrhaging Cash
Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), the spitfire with the HBCU bonafides, has dropped out of the 2020 presidential race amid rumors that her campaign lacked direction, had no cash and “no real plan to win,” according to one campaign staffer who resigned and burned the bridge on her way out the door. According to the Washington…
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Kellyanne Conway Tried to Burn Joe Biden. Then Her Husband Came and Lit Her Ass Up
I am convinced—and no one can unconvince me—that White House counselor Kellyanne Conway and her husband, Mr. Kellyanne Conway, have a sex game that looks like this: Kellyanne, aka Lil Half-Dead, will work for one of the most powerful racists in the country and Mr. Kellyanne Conway (I think his name is George or Bill…
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Trump Won’t Participate in This Week’s House Judiciary Impeachment Hearing Because He Did That Shit
Look, it’s time that we stop hemming and hawing around what we know to be the truth: Trump tied Ukrainian aid to dirt on possible Democratic 2020 rival Joe Biden and his son, Hunter. That happened. Full stop. What’s happened since then has been a game of let’s see if the GOP can make a…
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Fear of a White Moderate
Remember that time when white supremacists overthrew the government? No, not when they subverted the U.S. Constitution by deciding enslaved Africans were three-fifths of a white man. I’m talking about the other time. No, not when they added the Second Amendment to the Bill of Rights because southern slaveholders were fearful of armed slave revolts;…
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The Race for Trump’s Love: GOP Sen. John Kennedy Is Closing in on Sen. Lindsey Graham
Sen. John Kennedy (R-La.) is an old white man, which means he can pretty much say anything and not be held accountable. He can say things that aren’t true and then simply come back late and claim “I misspoke” or just yell out “fake news,” and despite there being camera footage, he can still insist…
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President Face-Skin Doesn’t Match His Neck-Skin Calls Impeachment Hearings a ‘Big Time Hoax’
Stop me if you’ve heard this before. Seriously, stop me. Why aren’t you stopping me? The president got in front of cameras with his face all orange-y and his neck all white before leaving to go to London to argue some NATO shit that he doesn’t understand and told the cameras that the impeachment hearing…
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We Knew It: Melania Trump Reportedly Sleeps in the Guest Bedroom Where Michelle Obama’s Mom Used to Stay
Melania Trump is no damsel in distress; in fact, she’s a calculated genius (if her visa is to be believed) who plotted on the old orange man with the attractive bank account. But unless Scrooge McDuck sleeps with his money, Melania reportedly has no interest in laying next to his old wrinkly ass. And that…
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Black Federal Judge Strikes Crucial Blow Against Trump's 'Absolute Immunity' Claims: 'Presidents Are Not Kings'
In a ruling late Monday, Federal District Court Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson said former White House counsel Don McGahn must obey a subpoena to testify before Congress. The subpoena, issued in April, came from the House Judiciary Committee as part of its investigation into possible obstruction of justice by President Donald Trump. As NBC News…
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Pete Buttigieg Is a Lying MF
Seven thousand three hundred twenty-two dollars. I hid it in a white Piggly Wiggly bag in the back of the dishwasher. Every single time I returned to that tiny apartment, I opened up that Navajo-white Kenmore dishwasher and made sure it was there. It was not a gift. It was not a reward. It wasn’t…