Politics
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Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis Is Dumb AF, Claims Coronavirus Hasn’t Killed Anyone Under 25
I know that what I’m about to type may be blasphemous—I’m sheltering-in-place with a toddler who can’t stop watching a video of Hickory Dickory Dock, so I could be delusional—but Ron DeSantis might be the dumbest man in America who doesn’t have the last name “Trump.” On Thursday, this “Florida Man” spouted that the coronavirus…
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Was Trump Gifting Ventilators to His Allies? One Congresswoman Thinks So and She Has Receipts
On Wednesday evening, Rep. Diana DeGette claimed that President Trump was running a little quid-pro-ventilators as he tried to garner political favor during a global pandemic. According to CNN, the Colorado Democrat put in an order for ventilators that went all but ignored. But, when vulnerable GOP Sen. Cory Gardner, who’s also from her state,…
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The Lonely Case for Joe Biden
Joe Biden has been, in order, a dangerous young politician, a disappointing older politician, a laughable Democratic presidential candidate, a middling vice president, an uninspired Democratic presidential candidate, and now an uninspiring Democratic nominee. The most charitable encapsulation of him is that he’s merely a benevolent anachronism in over his head—an innocuous relic yet to…
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Elizabeth Warren Has a Plan to Make Voting Easier and Safer This November—If You're Into That Kind of Thing
It’s hard to remember in the midst of, well, literally everything happening in the world right now, but we are just seven months away from a general election where we will either pick a new president or stay the same disastrous course. There are quite a few reasons to feel some dread about that, including…
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Something Tells Me Joe Biden Is Going to Mess This Up
As a Washington football team fan (until Colin Kaepernick’s protest, when I realized that the Washington team owner is not only a huge asshole but also a huge Trump donor, which is basically saying the same thing), I’m pretty familiar with the idea of a serviceable quarterback. Just a body behind the center calling plays…
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Tiger Beat: Reporter Asks Trump About Pardoning Joe Exotic During a Pandemic
It’s good to know that the reporters over at the New York Post have their fingers on the pulse of America. Currently, the United States is the epicenter of a global pandemic in which people are forced to stay in their homes, death numbers continue to rise and there still appears to be no end…
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Trump Doesn’t Care If You Die Standing in Line to Vote as Long as You’re Voting for Him
President Trump is not a smart man. He is a man of simple things. He demands loyalty. He demands that people see him how he sees himself. He demands that people lie for him. He demands that he win at all costs. So when Trump demands that “Republicans should fight very hard when it comes…
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Breaking the Bernie Sanders Bubble
There are five stages of grief, political or otherwise. This occurred when Black voters decimated him in South Carolina, turning the tables on a campaign that was riding high from winning Iowa and New Hampshire, two overwhelmingly white states with the total population of Brooklyn and Queens. Of course, no one should have believed in…
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Sen. Bernie Sanders Finally Makes It Official and Ends His Floundering Fish on Sand Run for President
Guess what, America? You aren’t going to have Sen. Bernie Sanders to kick around anymore because the independent Vermont senator has officially ended his presidential campaign, only four months after he should have. Sanders announced Wednesday that it’s over. He’s packing up his briefcase and moving back to one of his three houses to retire…
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You’ll Never Guess W.H.O. Trump Is Blaming for Coronavirus Pandemic Response Failure
President Joe Exotic has found another Carole Baskin to blame for his inept and lackluster response to the Tiger King of viruses. On Wednesday, the president did what he does best and shifted blame for his non-response to COVID-19 to the World Health Organization, claiming that they called it wrong and—get this shit—he also threatened…