Politics
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Amy Klobuchar Needs to STFU
To understand Amy Klobuchar, all you need to know is how she treats her staff. An aide once carried her bags and a salad onto a plane for a short flight. Once onboard, the aide realized the horrible mistake he made: somewhere between fumbling with the Minnesota senator’s luggage and her lunch, he’d somehow lost…
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Trump Logged Onto John Boyega’s Twitter to Call Protesters ‘THUGS’ and Twitter Wasn’t Having It
The president of white Minneapolis protesters who are only there hoping that someone breaks into a tobacco shop has done it again—and it only took a few days of protesting for it to happen. On Friday, Donald Laqtavious Trump logged onto John Boyega’s Twitter to call the protesters who were livid about the police killing…
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Penn. Democrats Livid After Learning Republicans Hid Member’s Positive Coronavirus Test Fearing Embarrassment
Democrats in Pennsylvania’s House of Representatives are fighting mad after learning that a Republican lawmaker tested positive for the coronavirus and hid the results from other state House members to avoid political embarrassment. According to the New York Times, “Republican House member, Andrew Lewis, confirmed on Wednesday that he received a positive test on May…
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Trump Shares Video Claiming ‘the Only Good Democrat Is a Dead Democrat’
Look, this isn’t Trump’s fault. In truth, he saw white men in cowboy hats and how was he supposed to know that they were promoting killing Democrats? I mean, sure, he could’ve played the video and listened to it but why would he do that? I mean, sure, he wouldn’t let a yokel in a…
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Education Secretary Betsy DeVos Is Trying to Steal Pandemic Aid From Public Schools to Give to Private Institutions
Education Secretary Betsy DeVos continues to be the world’s most ruthless criminal disguised as a caravan mom. DeVos, a member of the notorious South Central rap group P.T.A., is now calling for public institutions to share funding from the Coronavirus Aid, Relief and Economic Security Act, or CARES Act, with private and religious schools that…
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White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany aka ‘McEnanyOfTheState’ Has Voted by Mail 11 Times in 10 Years
Well, what do we have here? Looks like White House Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany aka McEnanyofTheState has voted by mail…(Rewind!)….Voted by mail….(I said!!!!) Voted by mail….(Can everyone hear me? Turn my mic up! I saiddddddddd…) Voted by mail…The same McEnanyOfTheState “who has vehemently defended President Trump’s baseless tirade against mail-in voting initiatives” has reportedly voted…
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Joe Biden and Trump Face Off in To Mask or To Be ‘an Absolute Fool’
If Joe Biden could punch President Trump in the face and get away with it, he would. Not because the president deserves it (he totally does), but because Joe Biden just likes punching people in the face. It’s kind of his thing. Biden is the most threatening man left in the battle for president and…
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A Handmaid’s Tale About the Coronavirus: Why (Some) White People Want to Be Oppressed So Badly
I will never understand why some white people (notice I didn’t say “all white people,” so please don’t email me explaining how you don’t own a gun and how your name isn’t Karen) want to be oppressed to the point of taking up arms. Yet, here we are in 2020, the most underbidding Spades hand…
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Widower of Joe Scarborough Staffer Begs Twitter to Remove Trump’s Conspiracy Tweets Claiming His Wife Was Murdered
Trump will stop at nothing to berate his opponents. For weeks, he’s been engaging in white-on-white violence with the married hosts of Morning Joe, Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski. For those who haven’t been up on the news, or for those who’ve been ignoring the news for their own mental health, let me give y’all…