The local highways will morph into parking lots, crammed with cars bumper to bumper. Bridges in Virginia will be blocked off. So, those Virginia drivers refuse to fight for air on a crowded Metro train, and decide to wait until the day of the inauguration to drive into D.C. will have to look on from the other side of the Potomac River. Millions of people will fill every space on the Mall, Pennsylvania Ave., and D.C.’s Metro trains and buses. Sounds scary, doesn’t it? Well, that’s why President Bush declared a state of emergency for D.C. for the entire inaugural weekend. In doing so, D.C. will receive $15 million from the federal government to help the District with “planning, security and transportation needs” during the weekend. Whew! Now, if only I could get tickets to FEMA’s Inaugural Ball.