Nadya Suleman: 14 Children, No Job, No Partner


Many feminists seem to support Nadya Suleman’s right to have a total of 14 children without the benefit of a job or life partner: it’s her body, after all.

Yeah…that’s fine and dandy for her—but what about the children involved?

I'm not saying you need a man, ladies. But caring for kids (14!) isn’t the kind of undertaking you embark on without a partner or at least a trained spider monkey to rob people at gunpoint, as needed. And don't get it twisted—you'll need a monkey that's grimey like that, because child rearing is not cheap, and it is not a game. It is a time-consuming, expensive enterprise. Science is whatever, but just because you can do something, doesn’t necessarily mean that you should, because it’s not always in the best interest of all parties involved. Doing it by yourself, you may not be able to pull off the kind of life you'd like for your child and yourself. We can agree that Nadya is an extreme case.


But, like Nadya, you don’t need a partner, because you are SuperWoman. And I can dig it.

I mean, strictly speaking you don’t need four wheels to get around. Honestly, you don’t really need two. You could get around on a unicycle—Square Biz. People ride them in parades, so why not? You only have a few miles to work, to the supermarket, Yoga class,  what have you. That’ll be a nice workout for you, and any passengers on your shoulders, because you’re just a gangster like that—-and that’s how you like to roll. So you head out, and people on the curb will look and be like “damn, look at that n*gga on the unicycle,” but you brush them haterz off. It’s your world, that’s YOUR unicycle. The thing is, by the time you make it a few blocks, you’ll realize that while you CAN ride a unicycle to work, it may be a lot harder than it looks. It may not be the optimum way or preferred method…like single motherhood. When you talk about bringing kids into this world, the first lesson is: it’s not all about you. Nadya’s gonna find that out sooner than later.

All in, I’m happy to live in a country where single women can do it Turkey Baster-Stylee™, although it is my contention that— if you are looking for a man—and can't find a worthy man in a world with millions of men, then the men may not be the entire problem. That point aside, single motherhood, in general, is a hard row to hoe, Jack. I wouldn’t wish 14 kids on a goat, unless that goat is caked-up and has lots of relations with nothing else better to do than make diaper runs. Because one’s plenty, eight is enough, but 14, as my colleague A-Train might say, is “riDONKulous.”

Suleman’s Dad is reported headed back to Iraq (!) looking for work to help support his grandkids, and her Moms, who is already taking care of the first six babies, calls the addition of eight  “unconscionable.”  David Solomon, the reported sperm-donor, is probably on the lam, hoping Nadya doesn’t lawyer-up and ask for child support, like other TB Mommies have. Dude may be looking forward to a very special Judge Hatchett.

I don’t think Suleman is emblematic of TB Mommies, but I think her case is definitely women’s rights gone wild. Do what you do—-but what about the kids?

Single Father, Author, Screenwriter, Award-Winning Journalist, NPR Moderator, Lecturer and College Professor. Habitual Line-Stepper