We always proudly applaud Lil Nas X for his trolling and marketing skills—it takes a lot of strength to be able to go head-to-head with the swarm of hateful messages we assume he’s privy to every day. And he does it with a wit that cannot be matched. Clearly, he has experience with that given his background running Nicki Minaj superfan accounts on social media. Still, there’s Lil Nas X...and there’s Montero Lamar Hill. There is absolutely a whole person behind that persona. So yes, that shit gets to him sometimes.

“But I won’t pretend like I’m never sad or anything,” he mused. “I’ve had a bunch of hard times this past week, after that performance and before the performance. But for me, that’s life, and one thing I 100 percent never do when I’m in these down moments is go to social media with them. Because I know that they’re going to pass, and what a lot of people like to do is use that against you.”

Overall, Lil Nas X is admittedly still on a journey to finding and becoming his “full self.” It’s a journey that’s fully his and I’m constantly in awe of how he’s walking it...unapologetically.