Hey! Y’all Need to Put Some Damn Respect on My Damn Suns, Dammit

Illustration for article titled Hey! Y’all Need to Put Some Damn Respect on My Damn Suns, Dammit
Photo: Christian Petersen (Getty Images)

On Wednesday, the Los Angeles Lakers beat the Golden State Warriors in a back-and-forth duel that was decided by an absurdly clutch three-pointer from LeBron “LeBron James” James. That victory secured them the seventh seed in the NBA Playoffs and will see them go up against the Phoenix Suns, who I am more than happy to remind you are the second seed. Apparently, the fact the Lakers barely made it to the playoffs doesn’t mean nothing because odds makers have the Suns as the underdogs against the Lakers.


OK, alright, I see y’all.

According to Arizona Sports, this was the first time in 30 years—30!—that the seventh seed has been favored over the second. You know what, I get it. You’ve got King James fronting the whole operation, and I’m sure he learned a lot in his time balling with Bugs Bunny. Anthony Davis is a rider, I can’t deny it, and no, I don’t want to fuck with him. This is also the team that rallied and took home a ring in what was easily one of the most bizarre and taxing NBA Finals.

So I understand why, on paper, you would be gung-ho about the Lakers’ chances, but let’s keep it a buck: a mediocre season is a mediocre season, and to me, seventh seed is kinda looking like a mediocre season.

The Suns, on the other hand, went off this year. The addition of Chris Paul and the leadership of Coach Monty Williams has seen my boys go from “well, maybe next year,” to actually being contenders. Devin Booker, Deandre Ayton, and Cameron Payne have put in that work all season long and I don’t see that stopping at the playoffs. We waited too damn long to get back here, and you think we gonna let the Lakers stop the momentum? The seventh seed? Really?

I’m not saying it’s not going to be a fight. I’m not saying we’re going to wipe the floor with them. All I’m really trying to say here is that I’m not going to be surprised if the only place we see LeBron ball out this summer is in Space Jam: A New Legacy.

So Suns, if you’re reading this, for the love of God, please ball out so I’m not up at work looking stupid on Monday.

The stylin', profilin', limousine riding, jet flying, wheelin' and dealin' nerd of The Root.



I am old enough to remember when ALL the stars went to the Lakers to get a ring before they retire in 2003-04. Phil Jackson was still the coach, and Malone, Payton, and a whole parade of perennial all-stars joined Kobe and Shaq in LA to get a ring before they retire.... then Detroit went to the finals from the East with Larry Brown as coach, and a whole bunch of role players (Rasheed, Billups, Ben Wallace) who played team defense and offense and humiliated the Lakers 4-1 in the finals. Would have been a sweep if Kobe hadn’t gone off in game 2. Turns out there is only one basketball, and if you have eight guys who all think they should take more shots your team is a fucking mess, and no amount of Zen-master coaching can get those egos in line.

Just to say... teamwork matters, coaching matters, role players matter, effort matters, and rosters don’t always make the team.

Suns in 5. You read it here first.