Friday's Headlines

BB: Lehman Stress Balls Coughed Up By Barclays; Bloomberg Headline, Not Ours

IHT: More Comes Out about Gaza killings; Israel Would Deny, But Knows How Much That Stinks in Reverse

Fox: Iranian Leaders Reject Prez's Gesture; Obama Says "Rahm, Fetch My Shinebox"

SR: 50 Cent Replaces Forrest Whitaker in Film; Apparently, Every Black Actor Ever Was Unavailable

The Job: Being Tan Is the Old Black

Forbes: Strip Club Holds Jobs Fair; Neither Set-Up nor Punchline in This Economy

Heritage: Blacks Definitely Trying to Perpetuate Species, Not Marriage

YT: A Wedding Disaster—You Might Feel Bad, But Not Bad Enough to Not Cackle with Delight

NYT: AIG Execs Getting Harassed, Claim Misery Will Make Them (Worse) Fiends

WP: Holder Tells Agencies to Open More Records; Agencies Ask to Just Be Called Cowards Instead

AP: African Union Suspends Madagascar; Whether with or without Pay Unknown

CNN: Desperate Japanese Head to 'Suicide Jungle'; Charles Grassley Feeling Extremely Topical This Week

AJE: Israeli Gaza Offensive Appears to Constitute "War Crime of Greatest Magnitude"

BBC: Obama Skypes with Ahmadinejad, Iranian People; Offers 'New Beginning'

ESPN: Day One Pretty Predictable in Tourney; No Knee-Breaking Reported

HuffPo: Unhappy Anniversary—A Slideshow on Six Years in Iraq

THR: Mary J. Blige Cast in Next Tyler Perry Send-Up 'Tyler Perry's Something or Other that May Involve Drag'