Image: Zemarcuis Scott (Photo via Texarkana Gazette)

Who among us hasn’t gone to great lengths to see our faves in concert?

In 2007, at the tender age of 19, a young Ibn was in need of a few hundred dollars to see the Glow in the Dark tour’s lone stop in Massachusetts. As a college freshman with a part-time job as a tutor at an after-school program, my options were limited. After losing a valet job on the first day (my first car was a manual Porsche; I had never driven a manual transmission) and walking out of a call center job (after learning my first $500 of commission would go to the house) I was low on money and options. Having amassed a formidable sneaker collection, I did the unthinkable and flipped a pair of gently-worn Jedi Nike Dunk SBs for a cool $400. Tickets were $360, tax included. Having completed the deal on a Friday night before heading to a house party, I sped to my best friend’s basement apartment to celebrate our pending trip to see a pre-MAGA Kanye from 20-or-so rows away.

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Before we could truly celebrate (drink) a fight broke out. I broke out. Police gave chase. Looking to shed the wacky tobacky in my left pocket, I reached down deep and ditched the contents…..of my right pocket. All $400 of it.

Think that’s pretty bad? Keep reading.

Last year, 18-year-old Zemarcuis Scott was arrested in Texarkana, Ark. on July 4th when he tried to steal a plane to see rapper Famous Dex perform in Chicago. After throwing his bike in a nearby ditch (in favor of his obvious upgrade) he climbed a fence before making his way into the pilot’s cockpit seat, where he was arrested.

Famous Dex, for those unfamiliar with the Chicago rapper, is most widely known for his 2017 hit “Pick it Up” featuring A$AP Rocky, along with his recent livestream beef with Soulja Boy (aka Big Drako).

According to the Texarkana Gazette, Texarkana Regional Airport security noticed Scott jump the fence around 2:30 in the morning before promptly alerting police. Scott, who told police he had been considering the heist for a month, said he was unbothered by his lack of training, believing plane operation to be little more than pulling levers and pushing buttons.

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Thankfully, Scott, who plead guilty to attempted theft of property and commercial burglary, walked away unharmed. Last week, Scott received five years of probation for each count, along with a $1,000 fine. Scott must also participate in any mental health treatment deemed necessary by probation authorities.

The moral of the story? Cop some merch and tell folks you went.