Over the next two hours, I literally spent the entire time reading every article online I could about the song, watching the video, and reading the lyrics and being entirely enraptured by the relatability and depth of the songwriting. The song is about generational trauma being transferred from person to person, and in this case, from her grandmother to her mother to her and what that looks and feels like, and the hope to break free from them. When she starts out the song say, “My mother was a blind architect, her mother was too….designing huge walls no man could ever get through…” I stopped the song and was like, “Bruuuuuuuuuuh. Woooooooow.” The “blind architect” phrasing is some Frank Ocean, god-level phrasing. The second verse starts with “My mother taught me the way to operate a crane, carrying heavy loads with a smile through pouring rain…”

Listen, I’m not even a lyrics person like a lot of other people are. I typically listen for how a song makes me feel, musically and emotionally. But these words took me clean out. On the hook, she warns, “don’t you build it too tall, it may never fall,” and I wanted to hug her so badly. I was basically having a whole moment of empathy and amazement. I was so impressed with every part of this song that I got mad that it wasn’t all over the charts. If Adele wrote this song, it would have been a number one song for weeks.

While the song is obviously written for women, the very idea of becoming what you see and what you’re taught is one that I sit with, especially because I have children and as my wife reminded me, just yesterday, “more is caught than taught.” I want to make sure I don’t teach my kids how to function with traumas that aren’t their own. My parents did a wonderful job with me, but there are things that I realize and recognize about myself now that aren’t my fault, that require (and have required) unlearning over time in order to succeed (when I have) in relationships and especially with my children. I’d hate for my children to build up metaphorical walls because of me, especially when I can see the cracks and fragilities. It’s hard to be human, and we’re all a work in progress. “Fragile” is a stark reminder of that and for the past umpteen hours since hearing this song, it has been on repeat. I get the message and the packaging is beautiful.


I hope that the song achieved its purpose for Eryn. I can say, indisputably, this song hit me like a brick (no pun intended) and it, that simply, moved its way onto the list of songs that are both beautiful and that will be part of my life from here on out.

It is, simply, beautiful.