Photo: Win McNamee (Getty Images)

A woman put your “president” in his place today, and he is mad about it.

Exactly one week ago, Speaker Nancy Pelosi simply asked the “president” to postpone the State of the Union address until the government reopened. But because Trump has the temperament of a three-year-old who has missed his nap, he threw a fit and his weight around in trying to deliver the speech anyway. I wish I could have been a fly on the wall to see the look on his face when Rep. Pelosi hit him back with a letter today that was short, sweet, to the point, and included the age-old office euphemism for “Bitch, did you read what I said in that last letter?”

According to the Washington Post, Trump huffed and he puffed and blew a lot of hot air around on Wednesday when he informed the speaker of the House that despite her request last week, he was going to show up at the Capitol on Jan. 29 to deliver his speech to Congress anyway.

As the Post notes, in order for that to happen, both the House and the Senate would have to pass a concurrent resolution in order for Congress to sit around and listen to Trump do his Adderall snort.

So good old Nancy put pen to paper (or computer to printer) and typed out a (dis)missive that I am sure had your “president” throwing his phone at the wall after he read it, because you know it stung to have a woman basically tell him, “Go sit your dumb ass down somewhere.”

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“Dear Mr. President,” Nancy wrote, all polite and shit. “When I extended an invitation on January 3rd for you to deliver the State of the Union address, it was on the mutually agreed upon date, January 29th. At that time, there was no thought that the government would still be shut down.”

Translation: When we made that appointment, no one knew you were going to show your entire petulant, childish ass and keep the government shut down for 33 days. Over a wall. You dumb motherfucker.

“In my further correspondence of January 16th,” she continued, “I said we should work together to find a mutually agreeable date when government has reopened, and I hope that we can still do that.”

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She hit that man with the “per my last email,” which is office-speak for “Bitch, I already said …”

Translation: I already done told your dumb ass that there won’t be any fucking speeches as long as the government is shut down. What part of that did you not understand?

“I am writing to inform you that the House of Representatives will not consider a concurrent resolution authorizing the President’s State of the Union address in the House Chamber until government has opened,” she wrote.

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Translation: We are not about to do no extras so we can sit around and listen to you breathe heavily in the mic, use a bunch of words that you don’t understand the definitions of, and cry about that got damn wall. Let it go, bitch.

“Again, I look forward to welcoming you to the House on a mutually agreeable date for this address when government has been opened,” she concluded.

Translation: I said what the fuck I said, you punk ass bitch.

You can tell she made him mad because he got on television and cried about it like the little bitch he is.

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It doesn’t get any better than that.

Nancy Pelosi: 1, Trump: 0.