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Lord Sayeth: Jeffrey Lord Is a Village Idiot, but That’s Exactly How CNN Likes It
Jeffrey Lord has the distinct honor of being one of the dumbest people on cable news. Considering all of the simpletons currently soiling the media landscape with their stupidity, that’s no easy feat. Last week Lord made headlines for declaring President Sweet Potato Saddam to be the “Martin Luther King Jr. of health care”: What…
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Evelyn Lozada Has Returned to Basketball Wives, and So Far Tami Roman Can’t Take It
At one point during the season premiere of Basketball Wives, the returning Evelyn Lozada asks a very poignant question: “Why the fuck am I here?” One of my favorite colored-people proverbs comes to mind: A check is a check. Although Lozada successfully managed to flee VH1 and go on to OWN to star in her…
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Top Model Needs to Do More Than Just Bring Tyra Banks Back
I conducted an informal poll of trusted homies about the state of America’s Next Top Model by asking one simple question: What’s the first thing that comes to mind when I mention Top Model? Most answered “Tyra Banks,” while a few mentioned infamous phrases from the show, like, “We were rooting for you! We were…
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White People Are So Happy They Can Now Drink Rosé Out of a 40 Ounce This Summer
When it comes to trolling “the blacks,” white folks collectively employ a “can’t stop, won’t stop” approach. Enter, the latest way to pour salt on our wounds and mock us: 40-ounce rosé. I know what you’re thinking if you’re a Negro: Since when is a 40 the move in the mainstream? After all, the idea…
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Could Someone Tell Tropicana Jong-il Jr. He Won’t Fare as Well in Politics as His Terrible Father?
Donald Trump Jr. is an asshole. He has the intellectual curiosity of a dead sewer rat, the political sensibilities of a racist Twitter egg and the charm of a spider bite. He comes across as the kind of person Richie Rich punched in eighth grade. The sort of prick who, when hearing “Niggas in Paris”…
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Black Republicans Are Mad at Omarosa, but It’s Not Her Fault They’re Still Foolish Enough to Believe in the GOP
There are many things about Omarosa Manigault that are befuddling. Like, say, why she enters every interview as if she’s Sensational Queen Sherri and everyone else is Miss Elizabeth or Sweet Sapphire. Indeed, very few ordained ministers maneuver like Omarosa, who seemingly resides in a constant state of “Who the fuck want war?” The fact…
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Ann Coulter Is Dating Jimmie Walker. Are Your Eyes Burning, Too?
Old people love to tell other people’s business without a single care in the world. And why should they care? They’re old as hell, so there has to be a certain reverence from anyone their junior. Well, if you were raised right, you show respect to the AARP demo, but even if you don’t, they…
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The Real Housewives of Potomac Returns: Still High-Siddity and Super Shady
Whenever I watch The Real Housewives of Jack and Jill Potomac, I have to ask myself if I really like this show or if I merely hate myself. Between their racial politics, color complexes and obsession with pretending that Potomac is the Washington, D.C., metropolitan area’s equivalent of St. Barts (select dictators certainly think so),…
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Sean Hannity Is Garbage, but Not All Opinion Shows Are Trash
Ted Koppel performed a great service to his country in telling Sean Hannity to his face that he was “bad for America.” Hannity can simmer in his lingering anger over the widely shared clip that originally aired on CBS Sunday Morning as he sees fit, but it does not absolve him of the sins that…
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Why Keyshia Cole Joining Love & Hip Hop: Hollywood Is Good for Her and the Show, and Great for Fans
As a lover of the subgenre of R&B I describe as “Eff-that-ninja music,” Keyshia Cole is a pioneer. Keyshia’s entire catalog more or less keeps within this prism, but her first two albums are her strongest efforts. On her debut album, The Way It Is, Keyshia was basically that girl with Kool-Aid-red hair who would…
