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Why This All-White Memorial Day Weekend Sale at Macy’s Is the Blackest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
1. Because reserving an entire section of the store for Memorial Day soirees, crispy cabaret linens, post-prom line-up BBQs and Kenny Lattimore jazz cruise brunches on skinny rivers proves that someone at Macy’s clearly did their research and knows we’re approaching prime “niggas throwing and/or attending parties where you’re mandated to wear all white” party…
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They Don’t Want to Preserve Life. They Just Want to Punish Women and Enact Pain
Last weekend, I was invited to a brunch hosted by Ebele Okobi, who is Facebook’s Head of Public Policy, Africa, and was my de facto tour guide and event planner during my week abroad. There were nine of us there—an African diasporic reunion of black people scattered throughout the globe but settled in London. Among…
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Video: What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Blacker, Explained
Today is What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Blacker’s birthday, and to celebrate it, here’s me talking about the book. And also parenthood, the value of humor, Darius Lovehall, and existing while black in white America. And by “talking about the book” I mean “talking about the book and also reading one of my terrible,…
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Things Michael Rosfeld Can Do Today In Pittsburgh, America's Most Livable City, Because He's Free (And Antwon Rose Can't Because Michael Rosfeld Killed Him)
1. Watch a pierogi race at a Bucs game. 2. Ride the Duquesne incline down from Mt. Washington, and take in the city’s amazing skyline. 3. Eat a Primanti Brothers sandwich in the Strip District or Oakland. 4. Ride the Phantom’s Revenge at Kennywood Park, and grab a funnel cake (with strawberries) to go on…
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Everything You Need to Know About What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Blacker, Explained
Crazy right? “Excited” is a word that exists. Unfortunately, it is not a word I’d use to encapsulate my feelings about this. Anxious, sweaty, and scared shitless are much more apt. Terrified works too if you’re a socialist. Maybe excited will get here eventually, but it’s taking its time. Excited is taking the scenic route.…
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An Investigation: Does Jerrod Carmichael Say the N-Word ‘With the Hard R’ in This Clip About His Family Asking Him for Money?
In a now viral clip from an upcoming episode of LeBron James’ The Shop, the topic of financial obligations to family members is brought up, and a few of the men present—Meek Mill, 2 Chainz, and Jerrod Carmichael specifically—weigh in. Although it’s impossible to possess an accurate judgment of their true feelings about assisting family…
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Your R. Kelly Jokes and Memes Ain't Funny
The R. Kelly cry face—memed into oblivion after footage of his bizarre and explosive interview with Gayle King was first made public yesterday—seems poised to replace the Michael Jordan cry face as the go-to stock image for brutal and humiliating public defeat. If you believe in karma, seeing him in such conspicuous anguish—and having said…
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How Much Money Would You Pay to Watch a Donald Trump Perp Walk?
My parents and I would sometimes play this game where we brought up a thoroughly unattractive and/or vaguely problematic dare (i.e.: Driving to GetGo while butt-ass naked) and then attached increasing dollar amounts to it until you finally said yes. (“Would you drive to GetGo while butt naked for $10?” “No.” “50?” “No” “200?” “Eh.”…
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A List of Things Personally Threatened By Billy Porter's Red Carpet Gown
1. My sexuality (of course) 2. My blackness 3. My black male-ness 4. My fashion sense 5. My understanding of how gowns work 6. My relationship with my dad 7. My feelings about carpets 8. My feelings about the color red 9. My feelings about when things like “carpets” and “red” are in close proximity…
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Does President Obama Know How Twerking Works?
While at the “MBK! Rising” conference in Oakland, Calif., last week, a student asked Barack Obama how to change the narrative on how men of color are generally perceived. He answered in the Obama-branded way he usually does when he speaks to large groups of young black men—thoughtful, measured, sincere, witty, and veering towards respectability.…
