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How Being Petty Won 2015
On July 21 at 11:46 p.m., Meek Mill, upset that Drake didn’t help him promote his recent album, took to Twitter to announce to his millions of followers that Drake doesn’t write his own rhymes. Then, 11 minutes later, he tweeted that he wouldn’t have even allowed Drake to be on his album if he…
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The 10 Blackest Songs Of All-Time
On Monday, we learned that Kendrick Lamar’s To Pimp a Butterfly and D’Angelo’s Black Messiah — two albums so Black they should have come with a barbershop poster and a pic of Margaretta Forten — were nominated for Grammys. The recognition of this unambiguously Black art in such an unambiguously non-Black space should not have been a surprise.…
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What's A Better Day For The Average Black Man: New Timberlands Day Or Fresh Haircut Day?
As we’re all very aware of, life for the average Black man can be very stressful. Dangerous, even. Not a day goes by when you don’t have to expend energy thinking about something that could very easily fuck your shit completely up; a list that includes police, hypertension, White people at work, Black people at…
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What Would R. Kelly Have to Do to Make His Supporters Turn Against Him?
Last week R. Kelly was invited onstage to perform at the Soul Train Awards—an event that was as close to a Memorial Day BBQ at a black family’s house as you’ll ever see on live TV. The only thing missing was an uncle in tube socks and flip-flops burning his shins while deep-frying a turkey.…
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Omarion Was Right: Any Song With "Eat The Booty Like Groceries" In It Deserves A Grammy
As we’re all quite aware of already, the 2016 Grammy nominations were released this morning. King Kendrick led the field with a whopping 11 noms, confirming that Kendrick’s 2015 will be one of those years remembered much more fondly by music critics than music fans. (And, before you get your pitchforks out, I’m not saying…
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It's Confirmed: Bad-Ass, Kick-Ass Black Female Lawyers Won 2015
As much of the country — including, even, school crossing guards — seems to be engaged in an “Oh How I Hate Muslims” pissing contest, it would be understandable for America’s HLIC (head lawyer in charge) to offer something superficially platitudinal about that religion; acknowledging that America is land of the free and home of the brave…
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The Difference Between ‘white people’ and ‘White People’
Last week I read a piece you wrote called “The Friendly, Caring, and Kind Crossing Guard on My Block Hates Muslims.” It talked about your reaction to this usually nice, white-lady crossing guard making an offhandedly bigoted remark about Muslims to you. Anyway, I’m bringing it up because of something you said in it: “Sometimes you…
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Two Days Ago, I Became A Dad. Here's What I've Learned Since Then
1. In the 48 hours since our daughter was born, my wife and I have received hundreds of texts, calls, emails, visits, and other forms of congratulations. I’ve also been asked dozens of questions. (“Did you change her diaper yet?” “Are you getting any sleep?” “When you go out tomorrow, can you get me some coconut…
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Yeah, If You're Still An R. Kelly Fan In 2015 You Just Might Be A Worse Person Than R. Kelly
I’m not going to say much about R. Kelly because, at this point, on the last day of November in 2015, there’s not much I can say about R. Kelly that hasn’t already been said. And repeated. And reported on. And recounted through anecdote. And even said by me on this very space two years…
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Kobe Bryant Is the Best Kobe Bryant of All Time
Sunday afternoon, while much of the country was either watching NFL games or fantasizing about rib eyes and milk shakes while completing day 3 of their annual post-Thanksgiving Day green-juice cleanse, Kobe Bryant announced that this NBA season would be his last. The news was both completely shocking and completely foreseeable. Because while it made…
