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Trump Believes Giving Black Voters Access to Voting Is Stealing the Election
President Trump doesn’t want people to mail in votes and he doesn’t want a Los Angeles suburb with a large black population’s votes to count. I’m starting to think that the president of the United States doesn’t want black people to vote in the upcoming election. It’s almost as if he’s a dishonest racist who…
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Trump Throws Racist Jab at Reporter, Then Throws a Temper Tantrum and Storms Out of Press Conference
The president wants to be celebrated for victories only he can see. To hear him tell it, the United States has defeated the coronavirus and everyone should already be back at work. The truth is that the United States has become the epicenter of how not to handle an infectious disease. The president also loves…
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Obama Owns a Penthouse Loft in Trump’s Head as President Spends Mother’s Day Tweeting About Barack
Can you imagine being so amazing that years after you’ve left a job that you were completely over, your successor continues to bring up your name and does so even on Mother’s Day?! On Sunday, the president of people who buy large trampolines to place outside of their doublewides, spent part of his Sunday coming…
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The White House Is a Coronavirus Petri Dish, Yet Mike Pence Still Won’t Wear a Mask
In the horror movie that has become the Trump administration, the president and Vice President Mike Pence are the jocks who believe there is nothing to be afraid of and walk into the haunted house to show everyone how crazy they’re being, never to be heard from again. The White House has literally become America’s…
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Turns Out That Mike Pence Hot Mic Empty Box Moment Was Just a Joke [Corrected]
Correction: Tuesday, May 8, 2020, 4:58 p.m. EDT: The last time I snitched I was 12. Me and another kid had gotten caught shooting BB guns in the woods and the apartment rental office where I lived found out and threatened to kick us out. They thought the guns were real. My dad walked me…
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God, Are You Listening? Senate Democrats Are Proposing $2,000 Monthly Payments
Kamala Harris may very well be the next vice president of America and she’s starting her silent bid to win the nomination off by winning the heart of Bernie Bros far and wide. On Friday, Sen. Harris (D-Calif.) along with Sens. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) and Ed Markey (D-Mass) “will release their Monthly Economic Crisis Support…
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Welcome to the Jungle, Steve Mnuchin: Axl Rose Brings the Treasury Secretary to His Knees, Knees
Axl Rose, lead singer for Guns N’ Roses is tired of Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin’s bullshit. On Wednesday, the frontman with tonsils made from barbed wire noted that some 70,000 Americans have died from the coronavirus and in case anyone was trying to figure out whether or not Steven Mnuchin on Trump’s taint was an…
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One of Trump’s Personal Valets Tests Positive for Coronavirus
Either President Trump and Vice President Mike Pence are the outbreak monkeys destined to infect the entire White House with the coronavirus since they insist on not following any of the orders that the rest of the country must follow, or they’ve moved one step closer to contracting the virus, as one of the president’s…
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Trump Hires Donor With No Experience to Run the U.S. Postal Service. What Could Go Wrong?
Since taking office, Trump has declared war on two enemies: Obama and America. For years, the president has waged an all-out offensive attack on the former president, who doesn’t give a fuck about him. Obama is living proof that ignoring haters burns them way worse than engaging them. Obama has literally been living his best…
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Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp: I Totally Messed Up Reopening the State, Growing Outbreak Is Stressing Resources
Notorious thief and Georgia Gov. Brian Kemp—who successfully stole the governorship from America’s darling and possibly Joe Biden’s vice presidential pick, Stacey Abrams—warned Tuesday that he might be dumber than the current president. Remember it was Kemp who walked out to a podium in front of God and errbody and said, in April—April!—that he just…



