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Trump Administration Kills Major League Baseball’s Deal With Cuba Because It Hates Obama and Brown People
In a move that can only be described as Trump on his Trump-shit again, President Trump, or “Great Leader” as he’s called in his white nationalist meetings at Mar-a-Lago, has overturned an Obama administration decision to allow Cuban players to join Major League Baseball teams without defecting. Mostly because the president of the United States…
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Trump Continues Reshuffling the Deck Chairs on the White House Titanic, Fires Secret Service Director
President Trump is removing U.S. Secret Service Director Randolph “Tex” Alles from his position, because he doesn’t have any idea what being president requires. On Sunday, Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen resigned for her position as the most deplorable person under Trump not named Sarah “Suckabee” Sanders. It’s been reported that Nielsen was going to…
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President Mocks Rep. Ilhan Omar Day After Trump Supporter Who Threatened to Kill Her Is Arrested
The great divider in chief just doesn’t get it or really doesn’t give a shit, but either way, his rhetoric is not without consequences. Police arrested Patrick Carlineo Jr., 55, of Addison, N.Y., after he allegedly made calls to Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-Minn.) in March threatening to assault and murder the Muslim lawmaker. And only…
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How 'Make America Great Again' Has Become a Global Symbol for Hate
Donald Trump may not be a full-on, card-carrying member of white nationalism… Fine, you’re right. Donald Trump is a white nationalist. Full stop. He speaks their language, he uses his dog whistle to rally his troops, he sees good people on both sides and has been reluctant on several occasions to call out white nationalism…
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Kirstjen Nielsen Out as Homeland Security Secretary Amid Reports That She Wasn't Willing to Break All the Laws
Kirstjen Nielsen, the woman with the worst spelled first name in the Trump administration, resigned as Homeland Security secretary on Sunday, evoking the famous tenant from the apostle Smokey, “You’ve got to be a stupid motherfucker to get fired on your day off.” “I have determined that it is the right time for me to…
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Trump Is Losing His Only Black, So He's Considering Adding Herman Cain to the Fed
Earlier this year, Ben Carson, the secretary of Housing and Urban Development, noted that he would most likely be stepping down at the end of the president’s first term. Which means that the president isn’t just losing his personal-walking ASMR station in Carson, he’s also losing his senior most black. While the position as most…
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3 More Women Come Forward to Claim Joe Biden Was a Bit Too Handsy After His Video Pledge to Do Better
Former Vice President Joe Biden allegedly had forehead-to-forehead conversations with women who weren’t his wife. According to three women who spoke with The Washington Post, Biden reportedly made them uncomfortable during brief meetings with the potential frontrunner for the Democratic nomination, should Biden ever officially declare. The women, Vail Kohnert-Yount, Sofie Karasek and Ally Coll,…
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Some Members of Mueller's Team Say Trump Report Way More Damaging Than Attorney General's Memo
Well, what do you know? The Trump-guy that Trump handpicked to run the Department of Justice—America’s top cop if you will—the guy that Trump picked to supersede Jeff “King Keebler” Sessions after he recused himself from all things Russia-related, didn’t quite convey the true essence of special counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation into Russia collusion in…
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Virginia Lt. Gov. Justin Fairfax Maintains His Innocence Against Sexual Assault Claims, Offers Result of a Polygraph Test
Virginia Lt. Gov. Justin Fairfax is maintaining his innocence against allegations that he sexually assaulted two women, both of whom recently gave interviews detailing their claims of what took place. According to CBS News, Fairfax offered the results of a polygraph test to prove his claims that the events were consensual, adding during a press…
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President Windbag Mistakenly Claims That Windmill Noise Causes Cancer
President Trump continued his assault on alternative energy sources that don’t line the pockets of the 1 percent by pulling out his fear-mongering air horn to claim that windmills decrease property value and the noise from wind turbines causes cancer. “If you have a windmill anywhere near your house, congratulations, your house just went down…
