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Help! Trump Spoke to CNBC and I Don't Understand Anything He Just Said
The president of the United States gave an interview to CNBC and he sounded like a man who doesn’t know what the hell is going on. But what was even more concerning is instead of his usual word-salad, this was more like a word Chipotle bowl that was dropped on the floor and then kicked…
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Trump Makes Get-Well Call to Democratic Rival in Hospital
Looks like Satan’s favorite tin-man with the perpetual fake tan and the white-man-lace front might have a heart after all. According to Yahoo News, the president of people who dress up as handmaids reportedly pushed aside his political differences to reach out to Rep. Jerry Nadler (D-N.Y.) when he was hospitalized in May. No one…
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Here's Why Trump Sent That Nonsensical Tweet About the Moon Being 'a Part' of Mars
The president is a goddamn idiot. If the president were in a Jeopardy match between a nonverbal slug and a piece of lint and the president only had to get one question correct the entire game and, if he lost, the world would end, I would say start shooting your shots with all those unattainable…
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Joe Biden Switches Position on Abortion Funding After Sen. Elizabeth Warren Gathered His Ass Up
Former Vice President Joe Biden is proving himself to be a fuckboi. At this point, I wouldn’t trust Obama’s BFF to tell me what he ate for breakfast this morning if he hadn’t checked with his campaign staff and taken a peek at his polling numbers to see where bacon haters have landed. For the…
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The Warriors Owner's Wife Received Death Threats Because the Beyhive Is Petty AF [Updated]
The wife of Golden State Warriors owner Joe Lacob has reportedly received death threats after she decided, using her own free will, to crane her neck across Queen Beyoncé’s air space to speak with her majesty’s husband, who apparently does something in music. During Game 3 of the NBA Finals between the Warriors and the…
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![Rich White Man Gets Away With Shoving Black NBA Basketball Player Because He Has a Lot of Money [Updated]](https://assets-server.theroot.com/wp-content/uploads/2025/04/29102705/xv1smiq0cibcvmx8eaag.jpg)
Rich White Man Gets Away With Shoving Black NBA Basketball Player Because He Has a Lot of Money [Updated]
Kyle Lowry was on fire Wednesday when he helped his Toronto Raptors dismantle a hobbled Golden State Warriors team in Game 3 of the NBA Finals, 123-109. The guard would have one of the best games of his NBA playoff career, scoring 23 points, but that wasn’t his concern once the game was over. Lowry…
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Nancy Pelosi to Dems: I Don’t Want to See Him Impeached, I Want to See Him in Jail! Suurrrreeeeee She Does
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi told Democrats during a meeting Tuesday night that President Donald Trump’s impeachment isn’t as high on her list as seeing President Donald Trump in prison. According to Politico, Pelosi reportedly made the remark after House Judiciary Chairman Jerry Nadler asked when, if ever, they could begin an impeachment inquiry. “I don’t…
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Paul Pierce Clears Up Longstanding Speculation That He Left NBA Finals in a Wheelchair Because He Had to Boo-Boo
Paul Pierce’s nickname is “The Truth.” So, don’t expect Pierce to lie about why he left the 2008 NBA Finals in a wheelchair. Let me set the scene for you: The Boston Celtics were anchored by the Big Three—Ray Allen, Kevin Garnett and The Truth. They were playing against longtime rivals Los Angeles Lakers when…
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RIP Baby Trump Blimp: Woman Stabs Baby Trump Balloon and Is Promptly Arrested
On Tuesday, a woman stabbed a Trump baby blimp to death. A video shot by an onlooker and published by the British tabloid The Sun shows the woman, obviously a supporter of the Grand Wizard of the White House, stabbing the balloon that depicts President Trump in his most accurate depiction—as a baby wearing only…
