white house
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CNN White House Chief Sends ‘Fuck You’ DM to Melania Trump’s Former Aide
Jim Acosta is currently battling April Ryan for the title of God’s favorite journalist. On Thursday night Acosta, CNN’s chief White House correspondent, was minding his own damn Twitter business when he tweeted about a Trump rally in Montana (yes, this bitch is still rallying. At this point, it’s a form of presidential masturbation), the…
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Old White Men Fight in the White House; John Kelly and John Bolton Get Into Profanity-Laced Argument: Report
There was a heated fuss-fight inside the White House, a battle of the Johns. And I don’t mean tricks. Well, they could be tricks if they were in Russia and the price was right. Those inside the leaky Trump administration told Bloomberg that President HoofHead von SpittoonFace’s Chief of Staff John Kelly and National Security…
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Nikki Haley's First Name Is Not Nicole and Other Fun Facts Now That She's Leaving the Trump Administration
Nikki Haley was the White House Nicki Minaj. I learned last Thursday that Nicki Minaj’s real first name is not Nicole. It’s actually Onika. Nikki Haley’s real first name also isn’t Nicole, either; it’s actually Nimrata. On Tuesday, the president announced to widespread panic and utter shock to absolutely no one that Nimrata “Nikki” Haley,…
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Newseum Honors Alice Allison Dunnigan, The First Black Woman to Serve as a White House Reporter
The first black woman accredited to cover the White House was honored with her own life-sized statue at the Newseum Friday, in Washington, D.C., the Associated Press reports. Alice Allison Dunnigan, who faced both sexism and racism during her career, was tapped to be the Washington bureau chief for the Associated Negro Press, after a…
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Trump Thinks Everyone's 'Out to Get Him,' and Called Jeff Sessions 'Mentally Retarded', New Book Claims
President Trump has proven himself to be a man that desperately wants to control the narrative about his life. He’s so obsessed with himself that he once posed as his own publicist to feed positive stories about his life to news outlets. Fear, a new book by Bob Woodard—one half of the duo that brought…
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End of Days: White House Issues Official Statement and Spells 'United States' Wrong
The treasonous White House is at it again. Normally when they issue an official statement regarding American interests, they have someone who reads over the document to sub out the word “Russia” and replaces it with “United States.” Well, it’s Friday, so that person must already be checked out because the White House just issued…
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At Least Omarosa's Got the Right Name for Her 'Tell-All' on the Trump White House: Unhinged
Like the rest of the White House’s merciless band of deplorables who’ve sold their souls to work with President Trump, only to be fired, Omarosa Manigault Newman, fresh off her highly respected appearance on Celebrity Big Brother is set to release her scathing memoir: “I told on Harriet Tubman” Sike! the book is really called,…
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Sean 'Spicy Facts' Spicer Is Still Trash
We were rooting for you! (Tyra Banks voice.) Fine, none of us were rooting for former White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer, but the hope, I guess, is that once he left the horrid Trump administration he’d finally admit that he was a lying ass liar and that he’s changed his ways. Welp, that ain’t…
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Does Sarah Huckabee Sanders Have One Foot Out the White House Door and the Other on a Banana Peel?
White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders’, aka Suckabee, aka Big Aunt Lydia, aka the Devil’s Mouthpiece, days are numbered, and at this point, it’s just a matter of when. I study the White House, and I also grew up in a dysfunctional family so I know when someone is on the outs and Suckabee…