white house press secretary
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Sean ‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer Hid in the Bushes to Avoid the Press After Comey Firing
Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer is a loquacious man when he wants to be, and when he doesn’t, well, he hides in bushes to avoid reporters who want to know what the hell is going on in the White House. After finishing an interview with Fox News, Spicy Facts hid behind tall hedges on the White…
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Sean Spicer Runs Out of Briefing Because He Just Can’t With Y’all
The White House briefing room erupted in cries of “Sean!” Tuesday when press secretary Sean Spicer bolted from the briefing without taking questions. The bulk of the press briefing was filled with remarks from White House budget director Mick Mulvaney, during which he attacked Democrats for thinking they won because they avoided a government shutdown…
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Sean Spicer Is Insufferable
As lovely a title as “White House press secretary” sounds, if the job becomes nothing more than trying not to lose your brains and balls to your degenerate boss who’s detached from reality, when does one’s inner Kenny Rogers appear to “know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em”? Granted, considering that Sean…
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‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer Was Once White House Easter Bunny; Most Human He’s Ever Been
Turns out that before becoming an inept White House spokesperson, Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer was a shitty White House Easter Bunny, so this isn’t the first time he’s represented a mythical stance as fact. Hiyoooo! In 2008, back when Spicy Facts had a sense of humor and didn’t take lying so fucking seriously, he used…
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Sean ‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer Checks Staff Cellphones Trying to Find Leak; That News Is Then Promptly Leaked
Since the FBI won’t do the White House’s dirty work, it looks like White House press secretary Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer is going full Encyclopedia Brown all on his own. Spicy Facts has reportedly sought random phone checks of White House staff to see if they can snuff out who’s been leaking information to the…
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Sean Spicer Looks Like Howard the Duck in Human Form, Is Scared of Children and Is a Terrible Press Secretary
Sean Spicer often looks guilty of something. He looks like the person who went into the work refrigerator, saw the juice with your name on it and drank it anyway—and put it back with not the slightest ounce of shame. Spicer also seems like the driver you end up cursing out on the freeway because…
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Sean ‘Spicy Facts’ Spicer Gets in Heavy Fuss-Fight With the Press
White House press secretary Sean “Spicy Facts” Spicer is so out of his depth, it’s amazing to watch. On Tuesday, Spicy Facts found himself knee-deep in a tense conversation with members of the press corps over a tweet sent out by the tweeter-in-chief. On Monday, President Donald Trump tweeted: I know it’s difficult, but ignore…