vice president
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Hey, Joe Biden Black Women Aren't Your Hood Ornament. Stacey Abrams Shuts Down VP Rumors: 'You Don’t Run for Second Place'
I hate taking a victory lap all over your face, but I tired to tell y’all that old ass Joe Biden, who shouldn’t even be running for the damn phone, may have hit his head when it was reported that former President Obama’s BFF was mulling over choosing Stacey Abrams as his vice presidential running…
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Biographer: Mike Pence Believes God Wants Him to Be President
Vice President Mike Pence, leader of America’s push for a space force, believes that God is calling him to be president. That’s right, the resident space cadet in the Oval Office not named Trump believes that God is “calling him” to “function as a president-in-waiting,” according to Michael D’Antonio, a CNN contributor and biographer of…
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Mike Pence Doesn’t Bat an Eye Bashing North Korea’s Military Parade While Praising Donald Trump’s Parade
Vice President Mike Pence refuses to admit that President Donald Trump’s call for a military parade is really just a dick-measuring contest of presidential proportions. Since Russian oligarchs all but awarded Trump the presidency, he’s been engaging in a game of chicken with arguably one of the world’s most unstable leaders, dictator Kim Jong Un.…
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Mike Pence Left the Colt-49ers Game Because He’s a Messy Bitch Who Lives for Drama
I’m not sure how puppet Vice President Mike Pence was able to leave Lucas Oil Stadium with the president’s tiny hand shoved that far up his ass, but I’m sure he’s used to being played for a fool. It’s in his job description. There is a stipulation in his vice presidential contract that requires him…
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Vice President Mike Pence Forces Reporters to Watch Hoosiers
I knew when I saw photos of Vice President Mike Pence in that dumb-ass leather jacket earlier this week that he was a big old movie buff. I figured it was all about Top Gun, but it turns out it was Hoosiers. Pence, aka Maverick, while on the latest leg of his Eastern Hemisphere tour…
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Mike Pence Issues Stern Warning to North Korea in a Dumb Leather Jacket
You know Vice President Mike Pence spends nights at home reliving scenes from Top Gun. He probably demands that his staffers call him Maverick and secretly refers to President TrumPutin as Goose. On Monday, Pence arrived at the gateway to the Demilitarized Zone dividing the two Koreas in a show of U.S. resolve a day…
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Watch Mike Pence’s Matrix-Like Deflection of Obama Wiretapping Claims Made by Trump
Vice President Mike Pence knows that President Mother Russia was lying when he took to the keyboard with his little fingers to type those crazy claims that former President Barack Obama wiretapped Trump Tower in New York City. In fact, the vice president pulled out some Matrix-like dodging moves when he was asked flat out…
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Mike Pence Doesn’t Like Condoms, Waited Forever to Stop HIV Crisis and Probably Only Likes Missionary Sex; He’s No Friend to Anti-HIV/AIDS Causes
Mike Pence is Lucifer if instead of creating hell after being drop-kicked out of heaven, Lucifer decided to land in Indiana and become a politician. Pence is nothing more than ugliness presented with pleasantries. Some appear to find that impressive—at least in comparison with President Minute Maid Mao. This is akin to arguing that Jeremih…
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Is Joe Biden Running for President in 2020?
Vice President Joe Biden knows how to keep a crowd on the edge of their seats. After wrapping a Senate session Monday, Biden was asked if he would run for office. “Yeah, I am. I am going to run in 2020,” Biden said. When asked what office he would seek, the 74-year-old vice president responded:…
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In VP Debate, Mike Pence Goes on 90-Minute Shaggy ‘It Wasn’t Me’ Defense
Unless you’re one of those people whose Pandora/iTunes/Tidal service features no music that dropped before “Trap Queen,” you might remember a pop-reggae song called “It Wasn’t Me” from one-hit wonder and Rick Fox look-alike Shaggy. The song notes Shaggy’s tale of woe as he is busted by his girlfriend for “creepin’ with the girl next…