trial
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Trump’s Impeachment Trial, Day 9: And the Winner Is…
Wednesday marked the first day that senators got to ask questions of both the House managers, aka the A-Team, and Trump’s defense lawyers, aka National Lampoon’s Goes to Congress. And the winner for best question of the day goes toooooo…Sen. Kamala Harris (D-Calif.), who asked, “is the president a lying bitch or a bitch that’s…
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Trump’s Impeachment Trial, Day 8: Never Have I Ever…
I tried to watch it. But the sudden death of Kobe Bryant and his beautiful daughter Gianna mixed with Trump attorney Jay Sekulow’s punchable face? I just wasn’t in the best mental space to hear more lies on top of mistruths on top of misdirections. But I know that Trump’s legal team tried to discredit…
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Impeachment Trial, Day 3: How Do You Get Liars to Care About the Truth?
So I know you didn’t watch Day 3 of the Trump Impeachment trial so allow me to recap all the bits you missed. Democrats continued to make their case, which was totally riveting btw, and then Rep. Adam Schiff (D-Calif.) pulled a sword and began hacking away at the podium. Notorious R.E.P. Hakeem Jeffries (D-N.Y.)…
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Day 2: Impeachment Boogaloo
Have you ever been to a rave? I have and it’s exactly what you’d expect: loud music, lots of footwork, glow sticks and drugs. But what’s most impressive about a rave is how long they are and how sweaty everyone gets because the whole room gets hot because of all the non-stop dancing. The second…
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The Impeachment of Donald J. Trump, Part 1: Pre-Fight Fuss Fight
The Senate impeachment trial of Russian Vice President Donald J. Trump began around 1 p.m. Tuesday, and here’s what’s happened and what we expect to happen on the first day. Senators, House Managers—aka the “Hit Squad”—and the White House counsel were all present and ready to go. Chief Justice Roberts brought the trial to session,…
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Mitch McConnell Is Prepared to Push Impeachment Trial Rules Forward Without Democrats
In what continues to be an impeachment trial tug of war over whether witnesses would be allowed to testify, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell might’ve drummed up enough support to pass his version of rules that would halt Democrats’ push to call for new evidence and witnesses until after the trial begins. According to Politico, no…
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Former National Security Adviser John Bolton to Go Full Tekashi 6ix9ine, Says He’s Ready to Testify
In what can only be described as the biggest switch since The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air replaced dark-skinned Aunt Viv with light-skinned Aunt Viv and acted like nothing happened, former national security adviser John Bolton now claims that he’s ready to testify in Trump’s Senate impeachment trial. On Monday, out of the clear blue sky,…
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Nancy Pelosi’s Playing 3-D Chess With a President Who Has Trouble with 4-Piece Puzzles
The U.S. president’s blind spot has always been women. The president is such a misogynist that he doesn’t believe that women are as capable, or strong and smart enough to outwit him, which is hilarious considering this is the same president that has trouble reading off a teleprompter. Nevertheless, Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi…
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Sen. Mitch McConnell Doesn’t Want Dems to Call Witnesses During Impeachment Trial Because He’s a Whole Bitch
On Tuesday, Sen. Mitch “Turtleneck” McConnell (R-Ky.) continued his mission to ruin the impeachment proceedings in the Senate by rejecting Democrats’ demands to have four White House officials called as witnesses because Mitch McConnell is a whole bitch. Here’s what we know is happening: On Wednesday, the House is most certainly going to vote to…
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Joshua Brown, a Key Witness in Amber Guyger’s Murder Trial, Killed Outside Apartment
A message has clearly been sent. Joshua Brown, a key witness who testified for the prosecution on Tuesday in the trial of killer cop Amber Guyger, was fatally shot outside of his apartment building in Dallas on Friday night. The neighbor of Botham Jean, who was murdered by Guyger, Brown’s body was found on the…