quarterback
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The NFL Hates Colin Kaepernick So Much the Tennessee Titans Just Signed Brandon Weeden
OK, at this point, it’s getting embarrassing the levels to which teams will stoop to try to sign a quarterback not named Colin Kaepernick. The Tennessee Titans just signed Brandon Weeden. Yep, Brandon Weeden. And don’t give me that bullshit that he never knelt before the flag when this asshat not only knelt before the…
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Dallas Cowboy Quarterback Dak Prescott to Pursue Ph.D.
Dallas Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott is a cerebral player. He was poised after being thrown into the fray when often injured starter Tony Romo went down in a preseason game. He not only took over the job as America’s Team QB in 2016, his rookie year, but he and beast running back Ezekiel Elliott led…
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TrumPutin Won’t Like This: Tom Brady Skipping White House Visit
When the Super Bowl-winning New England Patriots make their visit to the Orange House on Wednesday, arguably the most important player and friend of President Pee-Pee, quarterback Tom Brady won’t be there. Brady cited the president’s overall fuckery and disregard for men, women and children of color as the reason he won’t be making the…
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Seattle Seahawks QB Arrested After Car Crashes Into Bar
Seattle Seahawks backup quarterback Trevone Boykin was arrested early Monday morning after a car he was in crashed into a Dallas bar, injuring five people. Boykin, a former standout at Texas Christian University, was a passenger in the car that crashed into Sidebar Bar around 2 a.m., Fox 4 News reports. According to the news…
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Nice Job, Jameis: Tampa Bay QB Delivers Sexist Speech to Elementary School Kids
It was supposed to be an inspiring speech by an NFL quarterback. Instead, Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Jameis “Crab Legs” Winston decided to tell children—that’s right, little boys and girls—that men are strong and women should be silent. The Tampa Bay Times reports that Winston stood before third-, fourth- and fifth-graders at Melrose Elementary in…
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Hey, Cam Newton, All Quarterbacks Matter, Except When They Don’t
As we were all mesmerized by the Alpha Kappa Alpha-inspired outfit Cam Newton wore Sunday, I have to admit that I missed the delicious irony of Newton talking about feeling unprotected on the football field. My fraternity brother Bryan Kelly noted that as Newton talked about his unfair treatment, and how he felt that he…
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Sunday’s Best: Cam Newton’s Easter-Pink Suit and St. Patrick’s Day Hat
It’s getting harder these days to take Cam Newtown seriously. On Sunday evening, after the quarterback led his team to a 30-20 win over Arizona Cardinals, Newton walked into the postgame conference looking like a vaudeville sideshow. The 6-foot-6 quarterback was wearing a soft-pink suit, a leprechaun hat with one of those Ben Franklin quill…
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Colin Kaepernick to Make 1st Start This Sunday
It’s time for Colin Kaepernick to rise up: Chip Kelly, the coach of the San Francisco 49ers, announced Tuesday that he’s making the switch from the highly ineffective Blaine Gabbert to Kaepernick, NFL.com reports. Much of the Kaepernick news has been less about his football ability and more about his protests against overpolicing of black…
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The Sad Story of Ex-NFL Quarterback Marcus Vick Continues
The sad story of ex-NFL quarterback Marcus Vick continues as TMZ Sports reports that the younger brother of Michael Vick was arrested in Virginia on a drug-possession charge. According to the sports site, police went to Vick’s Newport News, Va., apartment Saturday after receiving a call from neighbors about marijuana odor. An intense weed smell…
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All Mansions Matter: Lawsuit Claims That Cam Newton Trashed Rental Property
Carolina Panthers quarterback Cam Newton is being sued for reportedly trashing a California mansion after his dismal performance in the Super Bowl. According to Yahoo! Sports, Newton is “facing a $270,000 lawsuit over alleged damages to an $11 million home he rented in Beverly Hills.” Newton rented the luxury home during the summer from a…