Politics
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Breaking News: Donald Trump Tells the Truth
We interrupt your Facebook scrolling, Candy Crush game, tweets or whatever you were doing (although we can’t imagine what you’d be doing on the internet besides reading The Root) to bring you this important announcement: News agencies across the country are reporting the collective, nationwide shock at the unthinkable incident that happened on Fox News…
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Trump Surrogates and GOP Pols to Meet With HBCU Heads During Black History Month
Given President Donald Trump’s recent interest in historically black colleges and universities and the rumored executive order supporting them, a group of Republican leaders plans to meet with HBCU heads in the coming weeks. The Grio reports that the meeting will include GOP congressional members and Omarosa Manigault, who is supposed to be presenting the…
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Trying to One-Up Obama, Trump Will Sign Executive Order Supporting HBCUs: Report
Perhaps after the now infamous Frederick Douglass debacle kicking off Black History Month, President Donald Trump wants to make it right with the blacks. According to a BuzzFeed report, the White House is working on an executive order supporting historically black colleges and universities—a way to crow, since some believe that President Barack Obama did…
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The Donald Trump Dictionary of Alternative Definitions
Do you remember when words meant things? I know it’s hard to imagine, but before Jan. 20, 2017, back in the pre-Trumpian era, during the salad days of U.S. history, when Muslims were welcome into the country and the president didn’t have the attitude of a petulant toddler, words had immutable definitions. Back in those…
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Birthing My Half-Black, Half-Pakistani, Full-Muslim Son in the Era of Trump
I went into labor 30 minutes after Donald Trump’s election night speech. I have the worries that any new mother would have about raising a child in the era of Trump, where ugliness is out in the open and civility no longer exists. My son was born pink. Not mocha, like his daddy. I really…
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The Woke Guide to the Super Bowl: If You’re Rooting for the New England Patriots, You’re Rooting for Trump
The two weeks between the NFL playoffs and the Super Bowl are usually incredibly boring. The same interviews, the same analysis for a game that Vegas picked correctly a month ago. But thanks to Donald Trump, this year it’s different. After decades of adhering to the “stick to sports” mantra, sports fans, pundits and especially…
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A Prayer Because I'm Just *CENSORED* Tired
Congregation of St. Panama Jackson the United Methodist Baptist Pentecostal AME Church of God in Christ Episcopal Primitive Missionary Baptist Down By The Riverside Holiness Church, please bow your heads…again: Dear 175 lb, carpenter god/God, afro-pic utilizing banned from the USA, Jesus, I’m tired. My feet are weary even though you’ve allegedly been carrying me…
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Trump Is the Boyfriend Who Can’t Stop Talking About His Old Girlfriend
President Donald Trump hasn’t accepted that his relationship with Celebrity Apprentice is over. He can’t accept that Arnold Schwarzenegger is the new boss with a new catchphrase. He also can’t deal with the fact that his old flame has moved on without him even though his new bae, the presidency of the United States of…
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Sean Spicer Looks Like Howard the Duck in Human Form, Is Scared of Children and Is a Terrible Press Secretary
Sean Spicer often looks guilty of something. He looks like the person who went into the work refrigerator, saw the juice with your name on it and drank it anyway—and put it back with not the slightest ounce of shame. Spicer also seems like the driver you end up cursing out on the freeway because…

