north korea
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An Annotated Translation of the Greatest Clapback of All Time
The text of North Korean leader Kim Jong Un’s response to Donald Trump’s United Nations speech will go down as one of the pettiest incidents in the annals of international shade throwing. To highlight the cataclysmic clapback of this piece of art, we assembled a group of world-renowned pettyologists from Atlanta; Compton, Calif.; and Brooklyn,…
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5 Times Donald Trump Proved to Be a Dotard
There are very few times that I’ve ever found myself agreeing with the rhetoric of North Korean leader Kim Jong Un. But Kim’s clapback after President Nooshi von BackWash screamed on him on a world stage (talking shit about a world leader during the United Nations General Assembly is the political equivalent of screaming on…
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The Face-Off Between the 2 Most Despicable World Leaders Heats Up
The president of North Korea is a socially awkward psychopath, and the president of the United States is a white supremacist sympathizer and a raging lunatic. Both men have access to nuclear weapons, and both men are currently in a dick-measuring contest that could make casualties of us all. Because North Korea can’t stop breaking…
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Some of Us Are Not Convinced Y’all’s President Won’t Start a Nuclear War
Let select members of the Tropicana Jong-il administration tell it, we needn’t worry about the threat of looming nuclear war. During an appearance on ABC’s This Week, national security adviser H.R. McMaster was asked whether or not the United States was any closer to war with North Korea than it had been in recent memory.…
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The Man Dance Between Trump and North Korea Continues; President Tweets That US Military Is ‘Locked and Loaded’
Donald Trump just won’t shut the hell up. Seriously. He won’t stop trying to get America into a nuclear war with the most unstable leader in the world. In fact, Guam—Guam, of all places!—is currently being threatened because the president won’t stop talking, or tweeting. At this rate, President Vladimir TrumPutin might be the first…
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Why Black America Isn’t Worried About the Upcoming Nuclear Holocaust
Dear White People: I know your last few days have been fraught with peril as your president has engaged the only world leader as crazy and demented as he is in an intercontinental game of the dozens. I can only imagine how it must feel to go from tap dancing through a world of limitless…
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Kim Jong Un Is Showing Us That Trump Is the Real Crazy Man
With each advancement that North Korea makes in its nuclear-weapons program, Donald Trump responds with predictable petulance. He warned that North Korea would face “fire and fury like the world has never seen” after learning it had produced a miniaturized warhead that can fit inside its missiles. In the past, U.S. leaders usually exercised calm…
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Trump Is Clearly Trying to Start a Nuclear War With North Korea; Here Are 5 Things I’m Going to Miss When It Happens
On Tuesday, the president of back-road moonshine runners decided to have a full-on dick-measuring contest with the most unstable nation in the whole, entire world: North Korea. Think about this; North Korea is so incredibly unstable that the one American, out of the billions of Americans in existence, North Korea loves is Dennis Rodman, arguably…
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Trump Is Going to Tweet the US Into a War
Another day, another dumbass tweet from President Tiny Twitter Fingas. I know there are those who believe that the media shouldn’t follow the tweets of the dictator-in-chief. Those who believe that his tweets only move the focus away from his work or lack thereof, but let me assure you that his tweets are important, and…
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If Dennis Rodman Is Our Hope for Peace With North Korea, We Are Screwed
Look, there are a lot of things that Dennis Rodman is great at. He’s great at rebounding. He’s great at getting tattoos and weird piercings. He’s not great at being an ambassador for the United States, mostly because of his history of drug use and rabble-rousing. I know that North Korean leader Kim Jong Un…