money
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10-Year-Old Wins Big on GameStop Shares His Mother Got Him for Kwanzaa
Here’s a heartwarming story that’s come out of the drama between hedge funds and retail traders (many of them from Reddit) who drove GameStop shares up in the stock market this week. The rise and fall and rise again of the stock price for GameStop (or GME) over the past couple of days sent everyone…
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Pay Me What You Owe Me: Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee Reintroduces Reparations Bill
“Is the stimmy a form of reparations?” my 1-year-old daughter asked me the other day. I looked at her puzzled, and then asked where she’d heard such big words. She replied that her daycare is near: I kid. My daughter doesn’t go to daycare with COVID-19 running unchecked in these MAGA streets. I live near…
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37 Major Companies Join Effort to Hire 1 Million Black People Over 10 Years
Recruitment startup OneTen has joined forces with 37 major companies to employ 1 million Black people over the course of the next 10 years. NBC News reports that Comcast, Nike, and Target are among the companies that have agreed to work with OneTen on this endeavor. The coalition will focus on finding sustainable careers for…
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LAPD Layoffs Being Considered in Los Angeles’ Budget Proposal
The ongoing pandemic has affected all aspects of American life, with the virus taking a financial toll on people, businesses, and even whole-ass cities. Los Angeles, which is currently in the midst of a financial crisis as a result of the pandemic, is considering laying off police officers to help solve its financial woes. “Layoff…
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Treasury Secretary Moves $455 Billion of Unspent Stimulus Money Out of Biden’s Reach Because Petty
Who doesn’t love a little light pettiness? There is a difference between my 1-year-old daughter throwing my 3-year-old son’s stuffed Mickey Mouse over the banister so that no one can play with it, and Treasury Secretary Steven Mnuchin moving $455 billion in unspent stimulus money into a fund that wouldn’t allow incoming President Joe Biden…
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Wisconsin to Trump: You Want a Recount, Cool. Pay Us $8 Million and We Will Hop Right on It
Wisconsin doesn’t have time for Trump, his goofy prepaid mall-kiosk lawyers or his bullshit claims of voter fraud and has put the president on notice: You can have a recount in Wisconsin (a state he narrowly lost), but you’re going to pay for it, and we need $8 million upfront because we’ve heard about how…
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Fox News Cut Lindsey Graham Off in the Middle of Him Begging With His Begging Ass
South Carolina Sen. Lindsey Graham just can’t stop begging with his begging ass, and you know who is sick of it? Fox News. Do you know how much Lindsey Graham, Donald Trump’s favorite ass pimple, has to beg for Republican PornHub to be so tired of his begging that they cut him off mid-beg?! Well…
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Why You (Yes, You) Are Broke as Shit and Will Never, Ever, Ever Be Rich So Stop Deluding Yourself, Explained
Wait. What? How can you even say that? How can I even say what? Don’t play dumb. I’m not playing. I’m naturally dumb. (Sigh) How can you—a person who 1) knows nothing about me and 2) knows nothing about the future—say that I will never be rich? Because you won’t be. And I don’t need…
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Compton to Launch Pilot Program That Will Give Regular Cash Payments to its Lowest Income Residents
On Monday, Compton Mayor Aja Brown announced the upcoming launch of a pilot program that will give regular, free payments to 800 of its lowest-income residents. According to CNN, the Compton Pledge will launch later this year and provide a group of “pre-verified” residents with monthly payments over the course of two years. The exact…
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How President Trump Went to Church and Became Every Broke Man at the Strip Club
There aren’t many times where I can say that President Trump and I share anything in common. In fact, there aren’t any. Not one. Then, President Trump went to the International Church of Las Vegas on Sunday, and he looked just as uncomfortable as most men do when they walk into the strip club sober.…