There’s driving while black, shopping while black and flying while black. But WTF is walking while black?

I know it’s important not to be wasteful, and to teach small children the importance of not being wasteful, but not putting toilet paper in school bathroom stalls and instead handing out wads of paper to students on an as-needed basis seems like some next-level anxiety-inducing shit, no pun intended.

It’s hard to assign an accurate definition for the oft-employed phrase “That’s some white people shit” because, well, the best-possible definition is located within the phrase. “That’s some white people shit” literally means, “That’s some shit so exclusive to whiteness that it deserves its own phrase.”

Please disregard that insensitive, clickbait headline. I misspelled the sentence: “Jacksonville Citizens Apprehended for Illegally Acquiring Communications Equipment.” Simple mistake.

On Friday, Jacksonville, Fla., Mayor Lenny Curry ordered a mandatory evacuation for certain parts of the city in anticipation of Hurricane Irma. One Jacksonville Pizza Hut manager, however, was not having it.

A young black man in Jacksonville, Fla., was harassed by a local sheriff’s officer after he was allegedly caught in the horrific act of jaywalking without a license.

A Florida man who was armed with a handgun and a rifle was arrested after pointing the weapons at his Muslim neighbors while hurling racial slurs and threats.