Donald Trump
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Report: Water Is Wet, Fire Is Hot—Oh, and Race Relations Got Worse After Trump’s Election
A fascinating new report has revealed some important information of which you may not be aware: If you touch a hot stove, you might get burned. Water is wet, fire is hot, and most Americans believe race relations in our country got worse after Donald Trump was elected. OK, so maybe the latest national survey…
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Doug Jones Wants America to ‘Move On’ From Trump’s Sexual Assault Allegations, Says He May Vote Republican
Because Doug Jones was running against an accused pedophile for Alabama’s vacant Senate seat after Jeff Sessions decided that he would like to ruin the country from inside the White House, no one thoroughly vetted Jones’ politics. And can you blame anyone for not knowing anything about Jones, really? We all knew that he was…
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Watch for the Hook: Sessions Continues His Dishonest ‘Make America Safe Again’ Tour
Jefferson Beauregard Sessions, the attorney general with the Mariah Carey memory, traveled to Milwaukee today to give a speech to law enforcement officers about violent crime in America. The speech painted a dystopian image of an America riddled with violent crime and promised a higher “tooth-to-tail ratio” in combating it. Sessions’ remarks gave criminal-justice-reform advocates…
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Trump and Russia Didn’t Just Collude; They Have a Shared Phone Plan and Gift Registry at Target
President Donald TrumPutin’s approval rating is hovering around the same temperature at which water freezes; meanwhile, the investigation by MTV’s Nev and Max into Russia’s catfishing of America’s voting process is heating up (meaning that Nev and Max are doing some serious Googling), and this president of Jacksonville, Fla., called the Russian president to thank…
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Omarosa: ‘Donald Trump Is Racial, but He Is Not a Racist’
After being ousted from her job as communications director in the Office of Public Liaison at the White House, Omarosa Manigault Newman still wants to stand behind the man who has had the opportunity to fire her not once, not twice, not thrice, but four times in the last 15 years. Omarosa claims in a…
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With This Alabama Loss, Trump Is Becoming the Permanent Jordan Crying-Face Meme
President Lil Handsy von BackWash can never take his L like a man. After fully endorsing an accused pedophile for Congress, his candidate, Alabama’s own Roy Moore, who totally rode a horse to the voting station to vote, lost. He lost because black women, who are looking more and more like the real heroes in…
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You Are What You Eat: Donald Trump’s Trash Diet, Explained
Because people are stupid. Also, you pronounced “soda” wrong. The New York Times published an article Saturday about Trump’s battle for self-preservation. It was an extremely interesting, nuanced view of Orange-Faygo Fuckboy. The piece examined how Trump didn’t think of himself as a man dominating the world stage as much as he considered himself a…
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On the Ground at the Mississippi Civil Rights Museum Opening in Jackson
It is debatable whether the unexpected snow hitting the South, including Jackson, Miss., affected attendance at the grand opening of the Mississippi Civil Rights Museum and the Museum of Mississippi History more than Donald Trump’s appearance Saturday. Civil rights icon U.S. Rep. John Lewis (D-Ga.) and Rep. Bennie Thompson (D-Miss.) were not the only ones…
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Trump Spoke at the Opening of the Mississippi Civil Rights Museum in What Was Essentially a Photo Op
President Donald Trump has made it pretty clear how he feels about black people. He has refused to condemn white nationalists and routinely calls out black pro football players for protesting police brutality. So why would the hater in chief accept an invitation to speak at the opening of the Mississippi Civil Rights Museum in…
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Trump Just Openly Campaigned for an Accused Pedophile
If there was ever a doubt that President Donald Trump is fully caping for his brother from another mother, Senate candidate Roy Moore, he cleared them all up on Saturday morning when he tweeted: The tweet came on the heels of a lackluster campaign rally Friday in Pensacola, Fla., where the president blasted one of…