Donald Trump
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Everything We Know About Biden’s Stimmy Package. Plus, Sen. Cory Booker and Rep. Ayanna Pressley Want to Give Babies Bonds
OK, who are we kidding? We all voted for Joe Biden for three reasons: First, he wasn’t Donald Trump, and I’m thoroughly convinced that if a piece of sock lint had run against the white supremacist in chief, we all would’ve changed our Twitter avis to “Vote Sock Lint 2020!” Secondly, he teamed up with…
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FBI Warns That ‘Armed Protests’ Are Being Planned in All 50 States Ahead of Inauguration Day
The FBI has received information that indicates the ADWPB (Angry and Delusional White People Brigade) might be going national with “armed protests” being planned in all 50 states as well as another “protest” in D.C. One thing we should all be able to agree on regarding the attack on the U.S. Capitol last week is…
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Corporate America Cancels Political Donations for GOP Legislators Who Objected to Electoral College Votes
Man, is Donald Trump the worst thing that ever happened to the Republican party, or what? Who knew that electing the Tropicana-flavored guy from The Apprentice to the highest office in the U.S. would lead to widespread voter fraud propaganda, an insurrection on the U.S. Capitol and the canceling of congressional Republicans by corporate America?…
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House of Representatives Formally Introduces Resolution to Impeach President Trump on Grounds of ‘Incitement of Insurrection’
The House of Representatives formally introduced a resolution on Monday to impeach President Donald Trump for the “incitement of insurrection.” CNN reports that the resolution to impeach the president was introduced by Rep. David Cicilline (D-R.I.) and Rep. Ted Lieu (D-Calif.). On Sunday, Cicilline tweeted that the resolution has 200 mostly Democratic co-sponsors in the…
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Capitol Police Officer in DC Riot Dies by Suicide; Chief Steps Down Earlier Than Expected Amid Criticism of Police Response
The attack on the U.S. Capitol might be over (at least for now), but the fallout continues as more of the criminals who attempted a siege on the building are being sought out and arrested, and calls for Donald Trump’s immediate removal from office have intensified. There is also the non-shocking revelation that off-duty police…
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Twitter Permanently Suspends Donald Trump’s Account for Violating 'Glorification of Violence' Policy
Twitter announced Friday evening that it would permanently ban the account of President Donald Trump after continuing to use the platform to incite violence following the riot at the Capitol on Wednesday. The company released a blog post explaining what led to this course of action. They cited two tweets the president published on Friday…
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Labor Department Suspends Trump’s Federal Diversity Training Ban—Because It’s Racist and Dumb
Welp, Donald Trump is on his way out of office and it looks like some of his stupid-ass policies are soon to follow. Remember when the commander-in-insurrection issued an executive order barring federal agencies and contractors from funding anti-racism and diversity training? Well, last month, a federal judge blocked that Orangey-white nonsense, and now, the…
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Trump Supporters Are Blaming Antifa for the Capitol Riot Because White People Are Racist Against Themselves
I’ll say it again: THE ONLY REASON TRUMP SUPPORTERS ARE BLAMING ANTIFA FOR THE CAPITOL RIOT IS BECAUSE WHITE PEOPLE ARE RACIST AGAINST THEMSELVES! Mostly, I’m joking. What I mean to say is that conservative America has spent years—and especially the last several months—condemning the violence, destruction of property and general lawlessness that sometimes (but…