blackest thing
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President Obama's "Folks Wanna Pop Off" Is The Blackest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
During a press conference this morning, President Obama used the term “pop off” in reference to people making uninformed and patently ridiculous claims about what should be done with France and ISIS. And, unless I go outside today and witness a Sojourner Truth hologram double dutching with Marilyn Mosby, I’m very confident in declaring that the Black…
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Johari Osayi Idusuyi (The Woman Reading At The Trump Rally) Is The Blackest Person Who Ever Lived This Week
Donald Trump is not a legitimate candidate for president. Sure, Donald Trump is running for president. And it seems like he will likely be the Republican nominee. And he might even be the president! This, unfortunately, is not a far-fetched reality. But even if President Trump becomes a reality, Donald Trump has never been and will never…
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This Painting Of Ben Carson And Jesus in Ben Carson's Home Is The Blackest Thing I've Ever Seen This Week
So many questions from this picture, discovered during a recent tour of Ben Carson’s home, including… 1. Who painted this? Do you think the people at the portrait store laughed when Ben Carson walked in and asked if someone could paint him and Black Klingon Jesus hanging out in a YMCA sauna, or do the people at…
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Why The Kayak-Eating Bear Is The Blackest Thing I've Ever Seen This Week
By now, I’m sure many of you have seen the footage of a bear in Alaska using a woman’s kayak to floss his teeth, ignoring the woman’s hysterical pleas to leave the kayak alone. And, if you haven’t watched yet, please do. Unbeknownst to the woman recording this — and, likely, unbeknownst to the bear…
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Viola Davis's Emmy Win And Speech Was The Blackest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
How to Get Away with Murder is not a great show. It’s not a bad one, but the way it shifts from 40 minutes of “Eh, let me check and see what’s on the Travel Network tonight” to 20 seconds of “WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED???” every episode is so conspicuous that you consciously become…
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Getting Kicked Off A Wine Tour For Laughing While Black Is The Blackest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
Every once in a while, you’ll see a story that’s so uniquely and unambiguously Black — with so many different aspects of Blackness involved in it — that it’s almost like someone had a Blackness Bingo card and was trying to fill every slot. The story of the 11 Black women thrown off of a…
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Why The White Supremacist With FUBU Sneakers Is The Blackest Thing I've Ever Seen This Week
An irony of the pseudo-citizen status often bestowed on American Blacks is the fact that we’re unquestionably and intrinsically American. We’ve been in America longer than America has been America and have been as vital to America’s current success as any other group of people. And, despite numerous legal, social, economic, and spiritual attempts to prevent…
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Correction: Bree Newsome Actually Just Did The Blackest Thing I've Ever Seen
Yesterday, I wrote that a Black president singing “Amazing Grace” at a Black church on national TV was the Blackest thing that has ever happened. I said it passed peak Blackness and entered gravitational time dilation Blackness. Dark matter, event horizon Blackness. Undiscovered dimension Blackness, redefining our understanding of how Black Blackness could be. And then…
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Why Baltimore Raven/Mathematician John Urschel Is The Blackest Person Who Ever Existed This Week
1. Because math — not English, not social studies, not horticulture, not even science — is the Blackest subject. At least it is according to JR Writer. And Fabulous. And Cassidy. And every other rapper who’s devoted several bars to bragging about dropping out of school but always being good at math. Because being good at…