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ben carson

Very Smart Brothas

An Ode To Ben Carson: Our Favorite Gifted-Handed Clusterfuck

Super Tuesday 2016 has come and gone. Barring a miraculous influx of cash from an itchy pocketed donor with literally no one else to give money to (in which case, I would like to point them toward my IRS bill because the Feds are absolutely not playing with me this year), we are more than likely…

By

Shamira Ibrahim

Published

March 2, 2016
Very Smart Brothas

Someone Needs To Put The GOP Presidential Nominees In A Van. And Push That Van Off A Bridge

While I was in Target a couple weeks ago, getting Diaper Genie bags and seeing if the latest issue of EBONY Magazine was there yet, The Wife Person texted me, asking me to pick up some bananas. I usually don’t buy produce at Target; preferring to buy my fruits and meats and veggies at Giant Eagle…

By

Damon Young

Published

December 16, 2015
Very Smart Brothas

The 2015 List of People We Don’t Mess With Any More

Notwithstanding the fact that two very smart brothas (Damon Young and Patrice O’Neal) have instructed me to never trust a Black man without facial hair — we (Black people) collectively stopped messing with Taye for a very different reason. Taye made headlines and our shit list when he said he doesn’t want his biracial son…

By

Michael Harriot

Published

December 11, 2015
Very Smart Brothas

This Painting Of Ben Carson And Jesus in Ben Carson's Home Is The Blackest Thing I've Ever Seen This Week

So many questions from this picture, discovered during a recent tour of Ben Carson’s home, including… 1. Who painted this? Do you think the people at the portrait store laughed when Ben Carson walked in and asked if someone could paint him and Black Klingon Jesus hanging out in a YMCA sauna, or do the people at…

By

Damon Young

Published

November 7, 2015
Very Smart Brothas

Ben Carson Released A Hip-Hop Ad. It Is Some Shit.

Hey African Americans, Ben Carson is targeting you. He has a radio ad out now that’s intended to reach urban demographics. Uh oh. You know what this means. Dammit. And of course it’s as bad as you think it would be because it’s EXACTLY what you think it is. In case you weren’t sure just…

By

Panama Jackson

Published

November 5, 2015
Very Smart Brothas

10 Things Worse Than Slavery, According To Ben Carson

While on Meet the Press last weekend, unintentionally ironic neurosurgeon Ben Carson compared abortion to slavery, stating “During slavery, a lot of the slave owners thought that they had the right to do whatever they wanted to that slave. Anything that they chose to do. And what if the abolitionists had said, ‘I don’t believe…

By

Damon Young

Published

October 27, 2015
Very Smart Brothas

10 Things President Obama Has NOT Been Accused of Being…Yet

It’s a day during a week during a year, which means we were overdue for another fun round of “President Obama is a Muslim”; the game which is basically the conservative’s version of spades. I actually wouldn’t even be surprised if some of them had regular “President Obama is a Muslim” game nights and potlucks,…

By

Damon Young

Published

September 21, 2015
Very Smart Brothas

Ben Carson Is The Dumbest Motherfucker Alive

I do not care that Benjamin Solomon Carson, Sr. graduated from Yale and became the director of pediatric neurosurgery at John Hopkins when he was 33, the youngest ever in that position. (For comparison’s sake, at 33, I was still saving my cups from Panera Bread — leaving with them instead of throwing them away, keeping…

By

Damon Young

Published

March 4, 2015