asshole
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Trump: I Got the Coronavirus to Prove I Could Beat It Because That’s What Leaders Do!
President Outbreak Monkey left Walter Reed Military National Military Medical Center Monday night and then took his highly infectious ass up to a White House balcony where he removed his mask and waved to the crowd looking like he was going to vomit or cough. He was out of breath and looked like he was…
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Trump Comes After Kamala Harris and Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, and AOC Claps Back
On Thursday, President Trump continued the verbal assault on prominent female politicians and an MSNBC host, and unless the 53 percent of white women who voted this fuckstick* into office don’t take notice and give a shit, he’s going to keep doing it and maintain the highest office in the land. During an interview with…
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Donald Trump Jr.’s Mongolia Trip to Kill an Endangered Sheep Costs Taxpayers Nearly $77,000
I don’t know where Donald Trump Jr. lands on the asshole scale but I have to assume it’s pretty high. Like, I don’t know what level of asshole you have to be to fly to Mongolia to kill a sheep—an endangered sheep, at that—who is just chilling, looking for salt and vinegar potato chips or…
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Arizona Republican Party Chairwoman Tells Anti-Stay-at-Home Protesters to Dress Like Healthcare Workers
I’m not sure if being an asshole crosses party lines, but man, there sure are a lot of assholes in the Republican Party. Like Dr. Kelli Ward, the chairwoman of the round table of assholes more commonly called the Arizona Republican Party, who recently encouraged stay-at-home protesters to wear scrubs and masks to look like…
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World-Renowned Asshole Afraid That New Film About Him Being a World-Renowned Asshole Will Make Him Look Like a…World-Renowned Asshole
The man is a certified dick whose Top 8 on MySpace likely included The Grinch.
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Now This Asshole Wants His Name on the Stimulus Checks Because He Loves Himself and You Should, Too
It’s one thing to do something nice; it’s another thing to do something nice and then demand that you be acknowledged. But it’s a whole other thing to be the president of the people and send them the most minimal bailout you possibly can during a global pandemic and then hold that desperately needed money…
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Human Poop Emoji Donald Trump Jr. Killed an Endangered Sheep Because He’s an Asshole
When the poop emoji wanted to move through the world without being detected, it needed a human host. The human host had to have very little brain activity, with little to no spine and who cheated on his wife with a member of Danity Kane. It needed to be someone who no one would notice…
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Texas Lawmaker Calls Former Special Counsel Robert Mueller an 'Anal Opening'
Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-Texas) is an asshole. He’s also part of a group of assholes known as Republicans. This asshole conglomerate supports President Donald Trump. Trump’s mouth is shaped like an anus. Gohmert knows a thing or two about assholes, so when the Texas congressman calls someone like, say, former special counsel Robert Mueller, an…
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Boxer Adrien Broner Cuffed in Miami After Yelling at Cops. Maybe the Police Tried to Holla at Him
One-time boxing champion Adrien Broner, who is absolutely not gay, was handcuffed by Miami police for being Adrien Broner. That is absolutely not an indictment on police, as Adrien Broner is an asshole of epic proportions. According to TMZ Sports, Broner was walking with his entourage, which included really good boxer Gervonta Davis, when he…



