america
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This Is the America White People Wished For. This Is the America White People Want
Since the 2016 presidential election, I have read and I have heard from people—mostly white but some nonwhite—that it’s unfair to generalize about white people just because Donald Trump is now our president. The rush to defend themselves has been so unceasing that #NotAllWhitePeople has become a popular and synopsizing shorthand for that collection of…
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Black Women Are People. Expecting Them to Be Our Saviors and Superheroes Is Killing Them
Of the myriad factors contributing to my mom’s death, the one I have the least concrete proof for is the one to which I attribute the most blame. I cannot prove that she died at 60 because she was a working-class black woman in a country built on and violent towards people who looked and…
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Have Fireworks All of a Sudden Gotten More Powerful or Something?
It’s almost the end of June, which means that in Washington, D.C., and, I assume, most other major metropolitan areas, fireworks, in preparation for July Fourth, have been going off for almost an entire month. It’s not uncommon to hear explosives being detonated at all times of day. Just yesterday, at roughly 5:25 a.m., the…
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40 Ways White People Say ‘White People’ Without Actually Saying ‘White People’
1. Americans 2. Real Americans 3. Middle America 4. Working-class Americans 5. Patriots 6. Europeans 7. Southerners 8. Midwesterners 9. Millennials 10. Christians 11. Evangelicals 12. Red-state voters 13. Rust Belt voters 14. Conservatives 15. Republicans 16. Suburbanites 17. Gentrifiers 18. Families 19. Veterans 20. Soccer moms 21. Management 22. Law enforcement 23. Hardworking Americans…
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Russian TV Mockingly Prepares for Nuclear War With Real Nuclear-War Instructions
The news clip was supposed to be a joke about how Russia is gearing up for a nuclear war with the United States, except the potential for an actual nuclear war exists, since America is currently being run by a circus clown minus the shoes, and Russia is being run by a Mafia gangster who…
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We Can Now Add Schoolchildren to the List of People Forced to Clean Up the Mess White Men Made
The biggest surprise of being a parent so far is how often my daughter surprises me. She’s a little over 2 years old now, and it seems like every week she does or says something new that I had no idea she knew how to do or say. Yesterday morning, for instance, she noticed me…
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America Will Not Stop Until Martin Luther King Jr. Is Completely Rebranded as a Slice of Avocado Toast
America’s progressive distilling, dissolution and dissolving of Martin Luther King Jr.’s legacy and the accompanying appropriation of his words is truly a wonder to behold. It is like watching someone pour themselves a shot of Jack Daniels—but in a gallon jug instead of a shot glass. And then watching them add more and more ice…
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Who Will Survive in America?
On Kanye West’s 2010 album, My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy, there is an often overlooked track entitled “Who Will Survive America?” The song features Gil Scott-Heron taking a dystopian look at how the world is coming to the realization that America is a bastard “hosed down daily with a gagging perfume.” After the passage of last…
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Are You Enjoying This NFL Season? Ya Know, if You’re Watching It
In total, I’ve watched maybe six downs of NFL football this season. I haven’t actively been boycotting; somehow, the NFL just doesn’t seem as enticing to me as it used to, so I’ve made no effort to watch any of it. And I was an NFL stan. It’s my favorite sport to watch. Of all…