administration
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Trump Says He Will Suspend Immigration Into the United States. Now If He Could Only Get Someone to Write the Executive Order
Trump is a victim of poor performance. According to several Russian prostitutes whom I didn’t speak with but will speak for, the president tends to jump the gun. On Tuesday, Trump’s minions—also known as his administration—were hurrying to get together an executive order after Trump late-night tweeted to Vladimir Putin “Hey, big head. You up?”…
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Trump Administration Looking to Reopen America Next Month Because They’re All Idiots
Dr. Ben Carson is a world-renowned surgeon who may go down in history as one of the best to ever wield a scalpel. He’s currently a member of the Trump administration, and his position? He’s the doctor of housing. He may have been the only hope in terms of flattening the curve of idiocy inside…
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It’s Time for Dr. Fauci to Tackle the President, Steal the Mic and Keep Telling America the Truth
During these pandemic times and on these pandemic streets, Dr. Anthony S. Fauci, the longtime director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID), is the lone adult in the room. He’s literally the only one in Trump’s administration who knows what the fuck he’s talking about. The problem is the president—the man…
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Good News for Tardy Tax Payers: The White House Will Extend Filing Deadlines an Extra Three Months
In these trying times, we could all use an extra grace period to get all of our affairs in order. Of course, there are those of us who wait until the last minute to get things done regardless of the times. In either case, there’s a bit of good news on the horizon for people…
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Obama-Appointed Judge Blocks Donald Trump's Plan to Kick Nearly One Million Americans Off of Food Stamps
The Meglomaniac-In-Chief ’s continuous war on the poor has hit a snag. In his quest to Make American Hate Again, President Donald Trump and his administration were planning to make life even worse for food-insecure families when the sought to proceed with measures to remove nearly three-quarters of a million people from Supplemental Nutrition Assistance…
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OK Trump, We Get It, You Hate Muslims: Nigeria is Unhappy to be Among Six New Countries Banned From U.S. Travel
The Trump administration announced Friday that it is adding six new countries to the existing travel ban, joining the seven already on the list. Eritrea, Kyrgyzstan, Myanmar, Nigeria, Sudan, and Tanzania all made the new list of nations President Donald Trump is cutting off travel from, citing security risks. According to Washington Post, people across…
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Kerry Rides for Biden on Iraq War Vote, Says It Was All Bush’s Fault
During a Friday interview in Muscatine, Iowa, former Secretary of State John Kerry put a huge cape on for former vice president Joe Biden in defending the Democratic candidate’s Iraq war vote, NBC News reported. The reporter asked Kerry how he would respond to attacks by one of Biden’s opponents, who has seen a recent…
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#StayWoke: Don’t Let Russia Report Blind You, Trump’s Trying to Put Undocumented Immigrants Out of Public Housing
On the eve of the biggest literary release since Superhead’s first book, the Trump administration, being the cauldron of sneaky shit done while America isn’t paying attention, has proposed a new rule to end public housing aid for undocumented immigrants. The Department of Housing and Urban Development run by the president’s personal ASMR machine and…
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About that Trip to Cuba … Trump Delivers Another Blow to Obama Policy, Announces Limits on Travel to the Island
In what can only be considered a continuous effort by the Donald Trump administration to undo former president (and best president to ever do it) Barack Obama’s legacy, National Security Adviser John Bolton has declared that Cuba, Venezuela and Nicaragua are the three wheels on the tricycle of socialism while announcing new sanctions against the…
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Former Migrant Baby Stealer Kirstjen Nielsen’s Colleagues Think She’s ‘Completely and Totally Unhirable’
Former Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen, thief of migrant children, is going to have a tough time finding a new job because she was the head of the migrant baby stealing program and people outside the Trump administration don’t like baby stealing! According to the Atlantic, folks close to Nielsen say that in normal situations…