Politics
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May We All Have Love Like Obama and Biden
On Monday, an odd couple were spotted putting the band back together as former president of America, and lifelong president to Wakanda (where there are no term limits), Barack Obama, and his vice president and best friend (according to him), Joe Biden stopped to get lunch. The two men, who have been the subject of…
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Old White Men Beef: Trump to Koch Brothers: I Made Them Richer … I Don't Need Their Money or Bad Ideas
President Trump is falling out of favor of Republicans who don’t believe that camouflage is a formal attire. After learning that the villainous Koch brothers held a “retreat” (which was really a secret gathering in a lair) in Colorado Springs, Colo., in which the heavy hitting conservative donors bagged portions of Trump’s presidency, Trump railed…
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Attorney General Jeff Sessions Just Launched an *Insert Racist Dog Whistle* Christian Task Force
On Monday, U.S. Attorney General Jeff Sessions, the biggest elf to ever do it, just created a “religious liberty task force,” which sounds like a villainous superhero group that gets real close to you and asks if you know Jesus. Seriously, though, the task force sounds great if it were put in place to stop…
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Ruth Bader Ginsburg: I've Got About 5 More Years on the Supreme Court Before I Retire
Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, the oldest member of the Supreme Court, says she’s got about five more years, just long enough for righteous America to vote Donald Trump out of office before she retires. “I’m now 85,” Ginsburg said, according to CNN. “My senior colleague, Justice John Paul Stevens, he stepped down when he was…
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Trump Effect: Spokesman for GOP Senate Hopeful Called Memphis, New Orleans and Baltimore 'Shitholes'
Remember when Donald Trump referred to black countries as “shitholes” and then tried to lie and say he didn’t say it and then Omarosa got kicked out of the White House and confirmed that he said it? Well, it looks like the deplorable GOP leaf doesn’t fall far from the decrepit GOP tree as a…
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Rudy Giuliani Might Be the Dumbest Person in the White House and That's Good for Donald Trump
President Trump’s lawyer, Rudy Giuliani, might be the dumbest member of the president’s staff, and that isn’t a bad thing for the commander-in-chief. Because of the president’s antics, inability to spell words with five or more letters, refusal to stop canoodling with Russia and outright penchant for rage-filled Twitter rants, there needs to be someone…
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'We're Just Getting Started': Koch Brothers Plan to Spend Up to $400 Million on Midterm Elections
Imagine being so rich that you could buy anything. Although they don’t own a single Gucci belt, this weekend, the billionaire conservative Koch brothers gathered their likeminded cohorts together in a publicly secret retreat to announce their plans to keep America’s education system on layaway and purchase our entire system of government. Surrounded by 500…
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Donald Trump Clearly Doesn't Care About Election Security
For the first time during his presidency, Donald Trump chaired an election security meeting Friday in which senior-level national security experts discussed ways to protect America’s electoral process from foreign interference. The Washington Post reports, however, that the meeting lasted less than an hour and no new directives on how to counter or deter threats…
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End of Days: White House Issues Official Statement and Spells 'United States' Wrong
The treasonous White House is at it again. Normally when they issue an official statement regarding American interests, they have someone who reads over the document to sub out the word “Russia” and replaces it with “United States.” Well, it’s Friday, so that person must already be checked out because the White House just issued…
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Donald Trump Jr.'s Bae Kimberly Guilfoyle Left Fox News Amid Dick Pic Scandal: Report
Donald Trump Jr. is a lot like his father. He too was married and had that marriage dissolved amid cheating rumors. Trump Jr. left the marriage, started working out and posting Republican thirst trap photos on IG and was quickly linked to Fox News anchor Kimberly Guilfoyle. Side note: A Republican thirst trap photo is…