Politics
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Trump Walks Out of Meeting Claiming He Can’t Work With Democratic Leaders as Long as He’s Being Investigated
President Trump continues to govern like a spoiled rich kid plays football. We all know this kid—the one who has the brand new K-2 football signed by Russell Wilson who wants to play with everyone but only if everyone follows his rules. The kid that doesn’t want to play tackle and will get mad if…
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Nancy Pelosi Holds Closed Door Meeting With House Democrats to Quell Growing Revolt Calling for Impeachment
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is facing a growing swell from a group of valiant Democrats inside her own caucus who want their team to stop sitting on its hands and begin pushing for an impeachment inquiry of President Donald Trump. According to ABC News, the revolt from the small faction of Democrats has grown so…
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Russia Wanted to Start a Race War and Create the Confederate States of Wakanda
Recently uncovered documents reveal that prominent Russian saboteurs seriously considered an elaborate plot to round up America’s top gang thugs, send them to Africa, arm them, take over the Southern United States and start a separate country where presumably “Knuck If You Buck” would be the national anthem. This might be the stupidest idea in…
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Tennessee GOP Ousts House Speaker Who Was Too Racist and Sexist Even for Them
After weeks of turmoil following a text message scandal involving his top aide, Tennessee House Speaker Glen Casada announced he was stepping down from his role on Tuesday night. The texts, leaked earlier this month, were sent from Casada’s then-chief of staff, Cade Cothren, and contained a vibrant melange of sexist, racist commentary. Among the…
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Former Attorney General Loretta Lynch Denies She Pushed James Comey to Downplay Probe Into Clinton Emails
Former U.S. Attorney General Loretta Lynch, testifying before Congress last year about how the probe into Hillary Clinton’s email use was handled, said she never told ex-FBI chief James Comey to downplay the investigation by referring to it as a “matter” as opposed to an “investigation.” Lynch’s testimony was part of transcripts released Monday by…
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Ilhan Omar and Muslim Members of Congress Host Historic Iftar on Capitol Hill
Over the last three years, American politics have been shaped by a White House that has made a habit and sport of attacking Muslims in the U.S. and abroad with hateful rhetoric and policies. But that same time period has begotten another important political development: there have never been more Muslim representatives serving in the…
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Housing Secretary Ben Carson Was Asked About ‘REOs’. He Noted That He Doesn’t Really Mess With Oreos Like That
Me and my friends have this game where we argue about which famous people should’ve died but who lived long enough just to fuck up their legacy. It’s a brutal game in which we basically argue that big-boned Luther Vandross should’ve died right around the time that a chair was still a chair—not because he…
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Maxine Waters Rips Ben Carson, HUD for 'Actively Causing Harm'
Ben Carson’s stint as secretary of Housing and Urban Development has been marred by questionable conduct, his piss poor work ethic and an unprecedented degree of incompetence, but Congresswoman Maxine Waters is about to make things a lot worse for him. After unveiling his dastardly plans to evict undocumented immigrants and reduce rental assistance, Auntie…
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Beto O'Rourke Ain't Afraid of a Fox News Town Hall. Now He Just Needs the Network to Invite Him to Do One
Fox News: Beto O’Rourke: I’m not afraid to go on Fox News! Beto O’Rourke said Monday that, unlike his Democratic rivals who have sworn off doing anything with Fox News because of the news network’s racist and xenophobic background, he’d “absolutely” do a Fox News town hall. “Absolutely,” O’Rourke said about going onto Trump’s private…
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Lock Her Up! Betsy DeVos Used Her Personal Email for Government Business
Education Secretary Betsy DeVos, aka America’s most sinister church bake-goods saleswoman, used her email occasionally for government business and hasn’t saved the messages, according to an internal investigation released Monday. The Associated Press reports: The agency’s Office of Inspector General, which was investigating at the request of House Democrats, said it searched the department’s email…