Politics
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End of the Road: My Sarah 'Suckabee' Sanders Breakup Playlist
It’s not me, it’s you. It was always you. When we met, you were Sarah Huckabee Sanders, but once you opened your pie hole and started spewing hatred wrapped inside a lie wrapped inside a mistruth wrapped inside deceit, you earned the endearing nickname “Suckabee.” And while I never thought it would last, I always…
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Cory Booker Secures 12 Co-Sponsors for Reparations Bill
Presidential candidate and U.S. Sen. Cory Booker (D-N.J.) has secured 12 co-sponsors for his reparations bill, according to an announcement the senator’s office released exclusively to The Root. The bill, officially titled, “HR 40 Commission to Study and Develop Reparation Proposals for African-Americans Act (pdf),” would establish a commission to study the impact of slavery…
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Trump Is Trash, So of Course, He'd Still Accept Political Dirt on Foes From Foreign Governments
Trump just can’t stop stepping in it. If there were signs all over the White House pointing out where not to step, Trump would still step in it. If “it” were lying on a rug with a flashing, neon, talking billboard that played on repeat for Trump not to step here, Trump would lace up…
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You Are Not Entitled To Know Someone’s Sexuality
Before I did a remix album and solidified myself as being well-versed in the tops on the charts, I used to be a confused little boy who would try and convince himself that he liked women. Society told me that I was supposed to be straight, so that’s what I attempted to do. Needless to…
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Government Watchdog Wants Kellyanne Conway Fired, but Conway Wants That Smoke: 'Let Me Know When the Jail Sentence Starts'
Kellyanne Conway is a federal employee. As White House counselor, she is basically a well-paid executive branch federal employee, but a federal employee, nonetheless. So, as a White Walker affirmative-action hire, she isn’t supposed to be bashing Democratic presidential candidates. On Thursday, the Office of Special Counsel informed the White House that because Conway can’t…
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Ex-White House Aide Hope Hicks Is Said to Have Agreed to Spill Her Guts Before a House Panel Looking Into Whether Trump Meddled in Russia Probe
Is Donald Trump’s former communications director Hope Hicks getting ready to tell all? According to ABC News, Hicks has agreed to go before the House Judiciary Committee next week to answer lawmakers’ questions about whether Trump meddled in efforts to determine if Russia interfered in the 2016 presidential election. Hicks, who left the White House…
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White People Want Trump
Nothing matters. The 10,796 false or misleading statements don’t matter. The Muslim travel ban doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter that his administration literally locked children in cages. That the most powerful man in the country sat in an official meeting and insisted that some black immigrants come from shithole countries doesn’t matter. Excusing white supremacist…
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White House Fills Director of African-American Outreach Left Vacant After Omarosa's Abrupt Departure
Omarosa Manigault Newman Foster Brown Phyllis Hyman left the White House the way that she’s left every house in her life; amid flames and all kinds of rumors. She was the head of Trump’s African American Outreach until she was fired in 2017, but the post had been vacant since because, truthfully, who can fill…
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Trump Is Obsessed With the 'I-Word'—and No, the 'I' Doesn't Stand for Idiot
President Trump knows that the Democrats are split on whether or not to start impeachment proceedings, and while he’s reportedly convinced he won’t be impeached because, in his words, he’s done nothing wrong, that hasn’t stopped him from becoming fixated with the idea, both good and bad, of impeachment. He’s even come up with a…
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GOP Big Mad After Lawmaker Reads Letter on House Floor Calling Trump Supporters ‘Racist’ and ‘Just Plain Dumb’
So I do this thing with my wife where I say how I feel by claiming someone else said it. Example: Some would argue that my cooking is better than yours. Or: I’ve had plenty of people come to me to congratulate me on how I folded the bed sheets. I learned this from…