Isaiah Washington Leaves the Democratic Party. No One Cares

Photo: Rodin Eckenroth (Getty Images)

Noted thespian, Obama critic and advocate for deregulating murder, Isaiah Washington sent progressive political supporters into a state of not-giving-a-fuck today when he told a Fox News wrestler that he was leaving the Democratic Party.

On Wednesday’s episode of Nuff Said, which airs on Fox News’ online version of the ghetto, Fox Nation, the fourth most-famous actor named Washington behind Denzel, Instagram thespian Plies Washington and my cousin Metia (who was outstanding in my mother’s groundbreaking church play, Lawd, I Just Wana Be Sanctified), told former WWE wrestler-cum-political commenter Tyrus that he was leaving the Democratic Party, Fox News reports.

Advertisement

As a fierce critic of the Democratic Party myself, I have no problem with anyone who decides the Democratic Party is trash. I’ve literally written that. But I feel that anyone who talks about how little the Democratic Party has done for black people has at least a cursory obligation to mention that the Republican Party is far worse. Yet, Washington curiously decided to make his proclamation on the YouTube channel for white supremacy, Fox News, apparently not caring that the network would wield his announcement like a negro carrot to make it seem like he was a brave black man exiting the Democratic plantation.

And that’s just what they did. Washington didn’t just say he was leaving the Democratic Party. He said he was leaving the Republican and the Democratic Party. But through a series of furious cut and pastes, Fox News made sure you didn’t see any of that.

Advertisement

“The reason why I’ve chosen to walk from the Democratic Party as I know it, or the Republican Party, as I don’t know it, is something doesn’t feel right,” Washington said to the cool man with the backwards baseball cap, noting that he was walking away from political situations and organizations altogether.

Advertisement

Washington explained that it was going to be scary living in Hollywood knowing that it was controlled by liberals, but bravely vowed to continue his near-nonexistent career by following in the footsteps of brave nonpartisan new negroes like Kanye West and Van Jones, who have repeatedly assured us that they aren’t on anyone’s side as they trek to the White House to play footsie with Donald Trump at the new white nationalist Avenger headquarters while fulfilling their obligations to bash the black president every chance they get. It’s hard to tell if they don’t know Trump is retroactively applying Obama’s law to free people convicted of drug crimes or if they are intentionally lying.

Advertisement
Advertisement

It’s almost like they are playing Mad Libs.

The actor explained that he hasn’t seen any changes in his neighborhood during the 50 years he supported Democrats, conveniently forgetting that five of the eight presidents since he was old enough to vote, were Republican, as were the majority of the sessions of the Senate, House and state legislatures. I’m sure his neighborhood was doing fine, under Republican rule. I bet everyone in his hood has candy canes and ice cream cones under Donald Trump. Again, I’m not cheerleading for Democrats, but come on man…

Advertisement

At least state some facts.

Washington also took some time out of his busy walking schedule to repeat the illogical conservative rhetoric about gun reform, explaining that gun laws won’t stop criminals just like laws against murder won’t stop murder, which seems to conflict with actual data that show the murder rate is at an all-time low after tough, anti-violence laws were put into effect in states.

Advertisement

Also, advocating for common-sense gun laws to prevent gun crimes doesn’t mean you are anti-gun. I have advocated for tougher laws on sex crimes but I am not anti-sex. That idiotic idea is like saying people who want to lower the speed limit are anti-cars.

Advertisement

But I guess logic doesn’t matter.

As for now, I can hear the entire Democratic Party weeping, wondering how the hell they are going to wake up in the morning knowing that the fourth greatest Washington to ever put on pancake makeup won’t be in their corner.

Advertisement

Thoughts and prayers.

Share This Story

About the author

Michael Harriot

World-renowned wypipologist. Getter and doer of "it." Never reneged, never will. Last real negus alive.