I Don’t Have Enough Ambien for This: Roseanne Claims Valerie Jarrett Tweet Was About Anti-Semitism

Illustration for article titled I Don’t Have Enough Ambien for This: Roseanne Claims Valerie Jarrett Tweet Was About Anti-Semitism
Photo: Alberto E. Rodriguez (Getty Images)

Roseanne, beloved, the lesson here was to delete your account. Unfortunately for us, learning lessons isn’t exactly Roseanne Barr’s forte.


The washed-up comedian, who recently lost her ABC sitcom over a racist tweet about former Barack Obama adviser Valerie Jarrett, hopped onto Twitter Wednesday night in an attempt to reclaim the narrative—and prove that she was down with brown.

Let’s take this step by step:

1. The tweet you thought was racist wasn’t actually racist.

Barr now claims that her infamous tweet about Jarrett (“muslim brotherhood & planet of the apes had a baby = vj”) was actually about anti-Semitism.

“My tweet referred to the anti-Semitism of the Iran deal,” she tweeted Wednesday night.“Low IQ people can think whatever they want.” She then posted some links about Rod Serling, the creator of The Twilight Zone, who wrote the 1968 dystopian movie Planet of the Apes. In one article she posted, the writer analyzes whether the apes in the movie might represent Jews or speak to an Israelite society.

How in the fuck any of that makes sense in the context of Roseanne’s original tweet is beyond me. I’m just going to assume I haven’t taken enough Ambien to understand the connection.


2. She’s been watching a Malcolm X documentary.

Uhmm, congrats? Roseanne also wanted to point out that the documentary was directed by her “dear friend” Thomas Muhammad.


“Thomas Muhammad has agreed to speak for me, as he knows the work I have done in civil rights against racism ALL MY LIFE & understands my tweet was about Iran’s regime, not race -The website is: http://www.bbunity.com,” she wrote in a follow-up tweet.

Everyone, please welcome Roseanne Barr, civil rights activist, back to the table—not to be confused with Roseanne Barr, the woman who posed in a Hitler costume with a pan full of burned gingerbread men fresh from the oven.


3. She loves Kanye’s new album.

According to the New York Post’s Page Six, Barr also tweeted her love for Kanye West’s new album, Ye.


“MUCH LOVE 2 U all-thanks for helping and praying for me! It worked! Listen to @kanyewest new album about mental illness, it’s the greatest thing ever,” the outlet quotes Barr.

That tweet appears to have been deleted, for some inexplicable reason (looks in Kris Jenner’s direction), but Barr’s love for West can be seen in recent retweets of the rapper himself.


4. She’s stressed, but she’s fine.

Barr and her high-IQ self have been stressed out after the whole ordeal; she says she’s developed “a bit of palsy in my head and hands” but reminded her followers that “we are winning” and “PEACE is coming.”


Also, in the absence of taking any real accountability for her not-so-veiled demonstrations of racism and her insidious conspiracy-spreading, she’s been planting trees.

Well, bless.

Staff writer, The Root.



She thinks everyone is as stupid as Trumpers are. She has compared Black people to monkeys before. This is not new. Fuck her.