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2017 World Wypipo Tournament, Round 4: The Hateful 8
Ten days ago, 64 melanin-deficient standouts grabbed their flip-flops, business suits and privilege to compete in the world-renowned battle to see who will be crowned the champion of wypipo. Yet, this competition has led many to level accusations of racism against our tournament organizers. Some accused us of reinforcing negative stereotypes of Caucasians. Even though…
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‘Stupid or Liar’: What Justine Damond’s Death Proves About All Lives Matter
We’ve played this game before. It derived from a bit by podcaster Adam Carolla, who takes inane statements from politicians, celebrities and people in the news and asks: Are they stupid or are they lying? Today’s episode of “Stupid or Liar” focuses on the death of Justine Ruszczyk (Her name was not Damond. It was…
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The Black Person’s Guide to Marijuana
On Monday a group of plaintiffs that includes former New York Jets tight end Marvin Washington filed suit against Attorney General Jeff Sessions about marijuana. No, Sessions didn’t smoke anyone’s stash (although he might need to take a couple of hits after Donald Trump fires him in the next few minutes). The suit challenges the…
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Sunday’s Game of Thrones Episode Was All About Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump and Staying Woke
Even though we’ve discussed how Game of Thrones teaches us everything we need to know about white America, breaking down the political and social metaphors embedded within each episode requires a keen eye and the ability to understand the language of literary analogy. The messages hidden beneath the layers of turmoil and conflict sometimes need…
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The 2017 World Wypipo Tournament, the Not-So-Sweet 16: Choose Your Poison
In the NCAA basketball tournament, the collegiate teams that make it to the Sweet 16 usually consider their seasons successful. The same is true with the World Wypipo Tournament. Of all the cross-burning, safety-pin-wearing, statue-defending, cultural-appropriating Caucasians walking barefoot in Walmarts around the world, 16 have emerged as the most despicable. We should honor them.…
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The NAACP Invited Trump to the Cookout, but He Said ‘Nah’
You know how there’s the one person at your job, at your church or in your sorority who you can’t stand, but you have to invite them to the cookout because you invited everyone else, and you don’t want to be the asshole? Well, Reuters reports that in January, when the NAACP invited Donald Trump…
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Minneapolis Police Chief Resigns in Wake of Shooting
Minneapolis Chief of Police Janeé Harteau resigned Friday after careful reflection on the comments of Minneapolis city officials who told her, in so many words, “We’re gonna fire your ass.” Although Harteau was not fired, CBS News reports that Harteau issued her resignation “at the request” of Minneapolis Mayor Betsy Hodges—which is the Caucasian version…
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Michael Jefferson Mysteriously Died in Jail; His Family Wants to Know Why
The family of an Illinois man is searching for answers after he was found unresponsive in an Illinois jail cell. Michael Jefferson was serving time in Menard Maximum Security Correctional Facility for a parole violation of a gun charge, according to the Randolph Herald Tribune. Carlos Barbour—the Randolph County coroner—says that Jefferson was found unresponsive…
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Jada Pinkett Smith: ‘I Was a Drug Dealer’
Apparently, Jada Pinkett Smith was the plug. … Stop laughing. She’s serious. Jada Pinkett Smith appeared on Sway in the Morning Wednesday, promoting her movie Girls Trip. When the host of the morning show on SiriusXM channel Shade 45 asked her about Tupac, Pinkett Smith revealed that she was a dope dealer when she met…
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2017 Wypipo Tournament, Round 2: A Few ‘Dark’ Horses Among the Blackfaces in the Round of 32
Round 1 of our tournament is officially in the books, and now we are in the second round of the 2017 World Wypipo Tournament, sponsored by Caucasian Farms Potato Salad—whose ingredients are simple and fresh (it’s just mayonnaise and white potatoes). Please remember, this competition has nothing to do with white people. It is for…
