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Anthony Bourdain Was Remarkable Because He Possessed Qualities That Shouldn’t Be
There is no shortage of affecting, poignant, gleaming and evocative tributes to Anthony Bourdain today, as those changed by his life and overwhelmed by his death are finding the words to articulate who he was (to them) and what he meant (to them). He was, from all reliable accounts, deserving of this level of veneration.…
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Malcolm Jenkins’ ‘You Aren’t Listening’ Silent Interview Is the Blackest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
I remember when I first learned that the deployment of young people during the protests, marches, boycotts and sit-ins to defeat Jim Crow was strategic. Even as a kid, when I watched footage of that era, it was easy to notice that many of the people getting arrested, beaten, fire-hosed and bit by dogs were,…
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I’m Kind of Enjoying How Donald Trump Is Making the NFL Owners Eat Shit
The search for meaningful silver linings during Donald Trump’s presidency largely rests on the concept of maybe. Maybe this’ll inspire us to be more politically active. Maybe the Democratic Party will embrace a more progressive agenda instead of attempting to partner double Dutch with the right. Maybe, since Trump’s ascension has spawned an atmosphere where…
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Black Marriage, Explained, in 20 Questions About Pie
(Sidenote: I will neither confirm nor deny that these pie-related questions were asked in my house in a 24-hour span.) 1. “Did you get that racist-ass pie again, or the good pie?” 2. “You know that you’re the buyer of racist pies in this household, not me, right?” 3. “Remember the first time we had pie…
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Kanye’s Ye Is a Soundtrack for Gentrifiers
I was once a resident of Yeezus Island, but this spring has compelled me, finally, to put my house on the market. I doubt there will be any buyers, though. Maybe Jonah Hill might be interested, but my optimism has limitations. Anyway, Ye—which I listened to a few times last weekend—is many things. Undercooked. Scattered.…
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10 Still-Angry Observations From an NBA Finals Game 1 That Made Me Want to Break Things and Fight People
1. Jordan Clarkson hoops like how the screen would look in the ’90s when you tried watching porn on a pay-per-view channel you didn’t order. 2. I don’t know when exactly the Golden State Warriors became so fucking insufferable, but during Game 1, I realized that I hate them as much as I hate the…
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I’d Feel Bad for Those Fired Because of Roseanne’s Racism if They Didn’t Get Hired Because of Roseanne’s Racism
For the past few days I have been searching throughout my house for a fuck to give about the people who lost their jobs because of Roseanne Barr’s antics. I looked in each of the closets in each of our bedrooms. I looked in the fridge. I looked in the basement. I looked in between…
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Drake Dropping a Press Release During a Rap Battle Is the Whitest Thing That Ever Happened This Week
Although his ’fro might not nap all the way through—and although he’s been filmed saying the n-word in a quite questionable manner—Drake is a black man. There should be no questioning or doubting of that. He was born black and he gonna die black. His daddy is a literal cat daddy who rocks zoot suits…
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Why Are White Men So Angry?
White men are our angriest teachers, our angriest cops, our angriest accountants, our angriest horticulturists, our angriest greeters at Home Depot, our angriest Uber drivers, our angriest personal bankers and our angriest presidents. Yet they run most of the companies, possess most of the money, own most of the land, and are most of our…
